Worth It
by cryx
Summary: A phone call for Ran culminates into an encounter with the Black Organization and Shinichi's Return.
1. Late Night Matters of the Heart

A/n: I had posted this story under a different pen name, but I decided to finish posting what I had started a looong time ago.

Disclaimer: All characters--er, most of them--and basic idea and basic everything belongs to the ever-so-awesome Gosho Aoyama.

thoughts --I still can't figure out how to italicize things.

+Late Night Matters of the Heart+

"I'm home!" Her voice rang through the room, shattering the silence that had held its place in the detective agency for awhile now. Obviously, she was home, but she was the only one. She sank into couch with a sigh and stared out of the window, at the people passing by, all of them strangers. Not who she was looking for. Ran sighed again, but this time instead of relief, it was filled with something--something she had long since grown familiar to ever since that night, but something she still could not put a name to. A mixture of sadness, of yearning, blended in with a touch of hope. She knew all three of those feelings, had felt more than her fair share of them, but when combined together, what did they make? She didn't know, but she did know that they were special, so special only one person could bestow them upon her, a bittersweetness that often brought tears to her eyes.

How long had it been? She couldn't tell. She remembered the moment as clearly as she remembered him, but the days, weeks, months that followed . . . they blended in with one another, as mixed together as her feelings, so that she sometimes felt she couldn't tell heads or tails of anything anymore. All because of him. Why? Why did he have to leave and make up such a feeble excuse, so that she would realize soon enough what was going on, that he had lied to her? Why did he lie to her? Why couldn't he have trusted her, just like he had always done before?

The slam of the door stirred her from her thoughts, and she didn't need to look up to see that it was Conan. She stood up, hoping he wouldn't see the tears that had been threatening to fall but had, as of yet, been contained with. Trying to shield her emotions, she stood up and glared at Conan.

"About time! It's seven, with no note, no phone call, no nothing. For all I knew, you could've been run over by a car, or lost, or kidnapped, or worse! Where were you?" She sat back down again after a glance at his shocked face, cringing a little. That anger had been a little too fake, she supposed. She shouldn't try so hard . . . but she knew how Conan would react if he ever saw her in tears. Such a caring child.

"Dr. Agasa's. And . . . I'm sorry. For everything." His eyes didn't leave the ground, and his tone suggested another meaning.

"Hm?"

Conan sighed and shook his head. "It's . . . it's nothing." After a moment's silence, Conan's eyes wandered around the room. "Where's Kogoro?"

"Dunno. He wasn't here when I came home."

"Oh." He grit his teeth, but after a moment's thought let it go. The chances of this case--if this was a case--being the one he had been waiting for were next to nothing, and he was tired . . . so tired of everything. Well, almost everything.

Conan was breezing through his homework hearing but unaware of the familiar kitchen sounds emitting from Ran's domain when the third member of the makeshift family stumbled his way from the door to his desk.

"And where've you been?" Ran asked, chopping the carrots with the ease of one who had been doing it for the majority of her life.

From the other side of the room the door to Conan's room opened slightly. Kogoro's only reply was a grumble before his face made contact with the steel of his desk and he was whisked off into slumber, drunk from too much beer as usual.

Conan could hear the exasperated sigh from the kitchen amid the sound of the knife cutting through the carrots and lent himself a smile in amusement. I guess it's safe to say that there wasn't any case.

He closed the door and ducked back to the last of his homework, Ran's talk of her father's spending most of his time with his beer than with his work lingering in his ears. This was better than before, when that shame of a detective spent all of his time either sleeping or drinking and none at his work. That he had work at all was thanks to Conan. That he was famous at all was thanks to Conan. But who knew that behind the at-most- times well- portrayed façade of a child was the mind of a high school detective, and a spanking good one at that? Certainly not Ran nor Kogoro, and he wanted to keep it that way. Most of the time. Other times, he longed to tell Ran who he really was, what had happened, why he was changed. He had wanted to, ever since she confided her feelings for him--or rather, for Shinichi-- after the incident. And he had wanted to, when he came through the door earlier to find her near tears. His--well, Shinichi's--best friend had become good at disguising her feelings, but he could see through them, even without the help of his calculating mind. After all, wasn't he, Kudo Shinichi forced into disguise, the one who had grown up with her?

But no, he told himself. Telling her would only put her in danger, and he couldn't bear to see her in danger. Telling her would only make her do drastic things, maybe - probably - get herself killed. And he couldn't bear to think that it was because of him. Telling her would only hurt her.

But not telling her, wouldn't it hurt her too? Yes, it did. That was an inevitable fact, and he couldn't chase it away from his mind, nor did he want to. He saw every side of her, had always seen every side of her, just as God did. Every way she was. Saw her anguish at his absence. Cherished her happiness, her love for life, her innocence, her faith in him, like a never-ebbing river that would flow forever, if need be. He put a hand into his pocket and smiled. It did need be, and she would, but it came the time that that river would smile again. And really smile, for the reason people did smile.

He had finished his homework and was about to go into the living room when the phone rang. He ducked back into his room, perplexing himself with his own actions. Why did his heart pound so much? All he knew was that a force too eloquent to be a voice admonished him to stay where he was.

"Dad, can you get that?" she called. "Dad?"

She turned off the fire to the pan and walked to the desk, picking up the phone beside her father who kept on snoring, in no way perturbed with the insistent ringing.

"Hello? Mouri Kogoro Detective Agency."

There was a pause as she listened to the speaker at the other end. Her voice lost its warmness, and she was at once distant, alert, suspicious. She swore she had heard this voice somewhere, and remembered all too well that it had proved to arrive packaged with ill omens.

"Who is this?" A quick intake of breath that came short of a gasp. "Shinichi?" A pause, and the coldness became edged with plea, with a reckless rush to find out more. "What do you know about him?"

A longer pause that filled the whole atmosphere with tension, and then a final "Okay" as the phone receiver left her ear, and slowly back to its cradle.

"Shinichi." she whispered.

She stood near the desk for a moment, gazing at the street below, the street where he would wait for her before school. The street where he waited for her before going to the amusement park . . . the amusement park where he had disappeared. Sometimes she had tried to forget him, and move on with her life, but by now, she had known she couldn't. He was too good, too real, too true a person to her to forget, and, whether they both liked it or not, he was the one who held her life at a standstill.

••••

"Ran?"

She stared at the table, at her hands, seeing neither.

"Ran?"

"Huh? What?"

"What's going on? You haven't eaten anything," said Kogoro. His eyes wandered from his daughter to the child she had taken custody for. "And neither have you, Conan."

"I'm not that hungry." she mumbled, glancing at Conan from the corner of her eye.

"Yeah, me neither."

"Huh, really. Lucky for you I'm not the kind of parent who won't let you eat after dinner," he said. His remark was greeted by a silence only he felt. The retort he had been looking for was "Lucky for you I can cook," but the person he expected it from was again barricaded within her own thoughts. The rest of the meal was finished in a hurried silence, a silence that stretched far into the evening, a silence that had none of the homey familiarity of the silence of that afternoon.

••••

Footsteps echoed through the streets as her mind raced with them, well aware that she seemed to be the only one to take these streets at this hour. She walked in waves of light and dark. Whenever she stepped within the shine of a streetlamp or an open shop, it was plain to see the sixteen to seventeen-year-old girl, dressed in shorts and a black sleeveless top. Her brown hair cascaded down her back, and, if one was able to get close enough, one would see that her beautiful, blue-purple eyes held an unnamed sorrow about them, a sorrow she usually kept hidden, but when caught unawares, that sorrow would work its way right into someone's heart.

And then in the dark, and she was yet another mystery waiting to be discovered, and then uncovered, not by a detective, but by someone who knew her well enough to tell her every emotion better than she did, who could tell it just by the sound of her voice on the phone. By someone who held such a place in her heart that she knew with the utmost conviction, that she would never forget him, never want to, will love him until the sands of Time parted for the world to see, until all of the mysteries within Eternity to be discovered only to find more mysteries, until the greatest secret of Life itself would be uncovered, by no deductions of a detective, but by the sheer will of thousands. Thousands fueled by One. But the secret hid itself well, extremely well. And perhaps, after all that had happened, perhaps she would still love him. As long as there was nothingness, and nothingness could never be vanquished. After all, hadn't she loved him before she had even met him? Hadn't their destinies been interwoven from the beginning, by a force just as great, if not greater, than Time, into a single red string?

She grinned to herself. Wouldn't he laugh if she ever told him her idle musings! But then, she would have to tell him her feelings first, and she would never, ever do that.

She could make out the top of the roller coaster they had rode on together, magnified and glorified by the white of the full moon. The roller coaster where she had touched his hand, where she had been about to confess her feelings before her courage failed her. She longed so much to confess her feelings now, but now was not possible. Now was when he became too involved in "cases", too driven away by his ambition, to save any place in his mind for her. A phone call once a week or so, a rare visit, and that was it. Ever since she had known him, he had wanted to become a detective. She had admired--still admired--his steadfast determination, but now, more and more, it frustrated her. She didn't want to fight with something she admired--his mind--for his heart. But sometimes . . . sometimes the feelings within her soul wielded no identification with anything she tried to tell herself.

She stopped her reverie to wonder at herself. Why was she thinking like this? It was something she would never do usually, but maybe it was just that the night and the feel of the whole situation got to her – she was, after all, back where it had all started.

Before she knew it, she was at the entrance to the amusement park. No one was there yet, and she had broken her watch while helping her dad on a case two days ago. All she could do was lean against the wall, watch the moon wrapped up in all its grandeur of stars, and wait.

The stars were bright that night, even among the far dimmer, artificial stars of Tokyo. She thought of all the stars she had seen, of all the times she had seen them, thinking. Perhaps that was something she had to thank for his absence. Realization of him. Even before . . . before then, she, Mouri Ran, had realized that she loved him. But how much? Back then she didn't know, and now, she wasn't sure either. When she had him, she never appreciated him for his full worth. He had always been there, to offer support whether she needed it or not, and even now, with him wrapped up in whatever case he indulged himself in, he was still there, somehow, to offer comfort. She had liked him back then, yes, developed a crush on him, but did she love him back then?

She couldn't remember. She couldn't remember if she even knew. Probably because she had never thought about it. Even if she did, why did she love him? Why did she think she loved him back then? Maybe for the same reason that most girls went wild for him - for his looks, his cleverness, his popularity. But now, she knew. Knew why she had really loved him. And she had really loved him. She knew he had something other than that, deep inside, something not many people could see. She loved him for him, to the purest sense of the word.

His stubbornness, his immaturity, his arrogance that, even if being what it was, could never hold him back from the sight of the truth. His sense of justice that spread to her, his determination, fueled by her encouragement, but fueled more so by his own sense of duty as someone with a dream. He was someone who would make whatever he wished come true, by his actions, his attitude, his will. His ability to somehow always make her world right again, because he was him. She loved everything he was, every way he were. She had his absence to thank for the realization of that, along with the stars he had given her.

It was hard to live without him once she had known him, but she had braved it, all of it. All of the memories, all of the calls that had ended too soon, but were long and frequent in comparison to his visits. Over the course of weeks, of months, of months and weeks enough to have passed the year-point, she had learned, far more than anyone else ever had, the true meaning of the phrase, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." Her heart did grow fonder, but its longing for him in turn hurt itself and its owner beyond agony.

When she gazed out of her window at night, she often wondered when the pain, the anguish, would stop. And then she realized it would never stop. Not now, not ever, and even Time could not ease her tears. Time was useless when it met love. Because after all, which was the older of the two? The pain would never stop, unless he was returned to her eyes, to her words, her smile, her life. Tragedy was a necessary wickedness, but sometimes, the best things were begotten out of tragedy. Thoughts, hopes, dreams, feelings. Everyday wonders in the guises of cocky mystery fanatics.

She raised her head at the sound of footsteps upon pavement. She shouldn't have looked at the stars, given way to her thoughts and emotions. The stars had always made her ponder, just like music did. Both were intoxicating, although she wasn't sure if that was altogether a bad thing. The figures were closer to her than she had thought at first, and she could make out-- black. The taller of the two appeared to be carrying some sort of small case. With a shock that she choked down from breaking the surface of her new cold, expressionless countenance, she realized who they were. The two men who had ridden the roller coaster with Shinichi and herself, were suspects in the same murder case, whom (now she knew) later her friend had pursued out of her life, but certainly not out of her mind, nor her heart, nor her dreams.

"Good evening, Mouri-san. I trust you're feeling well?" began the blonde one, talking as if they had nothing to worry about except for the weather.

She could recognize them anywhere. The two men who had been involved in a murder case with Shinichi and herself. Their get-up had seemed strange, but she had excused it once the bigger issues presented themselves that day. Namely, the murder and Shinichi's ever-so-touching exit. "Never better," she muttered, skipping right ahead to the subject. "What do you know about him?"

"Who? Kudo Shinichi? For awhile, Vodka and I just assumed he was dead."

Her eyes darted back and forth between the blonde one and the other one-- Vodka, the first one called him. She didn't say anything, but from the grin that festered upon the blonde one's mouth, she knew that something had given her away, whether it was her hands that clenched and unclenched or the flash of anger within her eyes or both. He knew he had her attention, and he knew that whatever information about Shinichi he wanted, she would the one to give it to him if she wasn't careful. Whatever happened to Shinichi, I know you've got a part in it. You were the ones he ran after before he got mixed up in his so-called case, she thought, but didn't say out loud.

The blonde one's quick eyes darted across the surroundings, and he began, in the same manner as before, "Why don't we take this elsewhere? Out here in the open, even if it is night, someone might suspect we were up to something illegal." His grin flashed again, arrogance accompanied by a spark of malice, an arrogance she began to loathe, even if it was only the second time she saw it.

They didn't wait for her to answer, but turned in the direction they had come and, with a gesture from the blonde one, Ran fell into step behind them. She bowed her head, her eyes pasted on the sidewalk, which glittered a dull silver from the moonlight. Nothing was spoken between them, but a million words raced through her mind. I might find out what's really going on . . . what really happened . . . She had suspected for a long time that Shinichi was hiding something from her, something she deserved to know. Something that may have eased her pain by the thousandfold whenever they hung up, or whenever he left. Maybe now, she would find out. Yes. Her hands clenched into fists again. Definitely now.

They stopped in an alley, away from the lights of the street, except for the one emitted from the moon. The blonde one turned to face her, not smiling now. She didn't know whether to be thankful for it or dread what was to come.

"Mouri-san. I'm someone who likes to get my work done, fast and simple. And I'm sure you won't take kindly to having your precious time wasted on formalities. So let's cut to the chase. I've heard talk that you don't think Kudo Shinichi is dead? That you claim he's been calling you, that you've actually even seen him in a few rare occasions? Explain."

She bit her lip. It was futile to feign ignorance against any of these charges. They were all true. Her interrogator knew it, his companion, Vodka, knew it, and she knew it. But what to say? She heard something click on the inside of the blonde one's jacket.

"Or perhaps you would like a little persuading?"

Looked up, and saw him raise a gun, pointed, unwavering, at her.


	2. The Truth about Lies

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

The Truth about Lies

A voice told her to let go of her cold outer shell, and expose herself, because it was only the quiet, harmless Mouri Ran that could stand any chance of survival against these two at the moment. She obliged gladly. She couldn't fight ice with ice, and these people possessed chilled hearts. Her eyes sought comfort on the stagnant, moonlit ground. A soft, reminiscing smile touched her lips and her words were wreathed in a serenity that made them all the more powerful.

"I have said that and I do claim that, because I miss him." She raised her eyes to meet Gin's. Cold, cold eyes betraying no emotion. She wasn't anything like him, so why should she pretend to be?

"You were there the day he disappeared, so naturally when you called, I linked you to his disappearance. I guess . . . I guess I was right in doing so. Haven't you ever loved someone so much you can't bear to live your life without that person? You probably haven't, and you won't live until you have. Everyone said that he was dead, but I wouldn't accept it . . . because I know Shinichi. I've known him for so, so long . . . I could never give him up. Never forget him."

What was she doing? She had never really told anyone that she had secretly loved him, except for Conan, and that was because he was so innocent that she knew she could trust him. She never even told Sonoko, her closest girl friend, but Sonoko had guessed and Ran couldn't change the truth. (Nor do I want to, she realized then.) So why was she telling all these preciously guarded, personal feelings to someone who happened to be pointing a gun at her? She didn't know, but sometimes, more and more recently than ever before, she didn't know herself. All she knew was that she had to keep on talking. That way, at least she could stay alive.

"I couldn't bear the thought of him not being in my life, only in my memory. I didn't want to think about not being able to love him because he was dead. I didn't want to think about my days, my future, without him when I've been with him for so long, so precious long. I didn't care if he was famous back then, and I don't care now. He was Shinichi, my best friend, my Shinichi, so special to me that I couldn't ever think of him as gone. He's haunted my days, and I know now that that is all I can ever hope for."

She sighed, wiped at a fake tear she realized was real, and continued, "So congratulations. Now you know something I've wanted to keep hidden forever. I made up my little fantasy and I've lived in it. Lived in it so much that it's become truth, my truth, and a truth I've led you to believe."

The silence that filled the alley, the lights of Tokyo bit straight at her heart. She took a deep breath, filled with all of the tears she had shed over him, filled with all of the untold wishes she had poured into the stars ever since realizing how much she missed him, and waited. She had become incredibly good at waiting.

The other one spoke for the first time, shifting his weight uneasily from one foot to the other. "Gin…"

Gin? So that was his name. She smiled. Knowing one's name made one seem a lot less indestructible. And Gin's chilling eyes didn't seem half as forbidding, the absence of his malicious smile half as terrifying.

The gun dropped to his side. Finally, he said, "Very touching, Mouri-san. Very touching."

Her hands clenched themselves before it even crossed her mind to feel relieved. No, they weren't going to let her go that easily. Not when—

"But you know that we have something to do with Kudo Shinichi's disappearance, unfortunately for you. And if you know that much, you've already known too much."

The gun was raised again, its barrel directed above her defiant eyes.

"It was a pleasure talking to you, Mouri Ran."

The adrenaline rush was intolerable, but it helped her out of the paralyzed fear the gun had put her in. She ducked a split second before the bullet whizzed past her head, the herald of a messy death making an irremovable dent onto the brick wall behind her. Before the expressionless glass of Gin's eyes could even have a chance to transform into shock, she had punched him in the stomach, panic and anger all rolled into one inside her fists. Then his eyes could do nothing but look shocked. She slid her leg under his feet, tripping him like she did most of the crooks she was put up against.

However, adrenaline could do nothing as Vodka drew a knife from its hiding place at his ankle and, in one swift motion, pinned Ran by the neck to the wall, the knife raised above her.

"You're gonna pay for that, you little b –"

He was cut off as he dropped the knife, and the hand that had taken hold of her neck went to his other wrist. He screamed in pain, and Ran realized for the first time that the hand was broken. It was then she noticed the case sprawled open on the floor near the fallen knife, its contents – several pills and something that looked like a flashlight – scattered across the floor.

Then she saw the newcomer who was responsible for this, breathing shallowly, an expression of anger mixed with regret etched over his face, deep within his eyes. It was Shinichi. She sucked in air, trying not to believe her eyes, but realizing that no matter how much she tried, she would have to believe them. Because even if she was afraid that what she saw was not true, she knew she had wanted to see what she saw infinitely more. Her mouth opened to speak, and her lips moved to form words, but her voice failed to carry her message.

All she could manage was silence, silence not unlike the ones she had endured all those cold, sleepless nights, wondering if the sky was nearer to her than he was. She bit her lip and decided that no matter how long it would take, this would have to wait. Something more urgent, although never more important, had to be done. Turned back to the man attired in black before her, and back to the matter at hand.

At first she had just thought Vodka had dropped the knife by accident – the case Shinichi had kicked had come so quickly she didn't even see it. She had been too busy staring at the knife, wondering when he would bring it down to make contact with her skin.

She wasted two seconds staring at her savior before realizing that, although his hand was hurt, Vodka's threat to both their lives was not in the least bit disturbed. A high kick to his shoulders followed by a trip like the one she had dished out to Gin, and Vodka collapsed on the floor just like Gin had been. Gin. Ran dug her knee into Vodka's spine, grabbed his right arm by the wrist, twisted it, and pinned it behind his back, not noticing the other black figure picking up the gun he had dropped and getting up, the other hand to his stomach.

Ran sensed something wasn't quite right, and turned to see Gin aiming the gun at her, the corners of his lips curving upward in an essence of that hateful smile. She sucked in her breath. The last dodge from the bullet was unbelievably lucky. She couldn't count on her karate skills this time. This time, it would be inevitable.

Gin grinned fully this time, savoring her fear. Then he shifted the gun from Ran to Shinichi.

"You're supposed to be dead," muttered Vodka, picking himself painfully from the ground.

"Exactly," from Gin. "You're supposed to be dead."

Neither Shinichi nor Ran said anything in reply.

"Explain why you're still here."

She swore she could hear the sneer of the notch as Gin's finger tightened on it after seconds of silence that lasted days. "Please. For your own good. Because the more you say, the more time you have left to live. And from my experience, most people want more time left to live, however desperate and pathetic those last minutes may be."

She heard a sigh, and then the words.

"There are a lot of things I've missed out on . . . lots of things." He snuck an eloquent glance at Ran, and something told her that although he spoke upon Gin's prompt, those words were for her. "I know you sure didn't mean for what happened to happen. I also know what you did want to happen – I've seen the things you do. And things like that… it's the things like that that have given me my calling. Something I still haven't exactly given up despite the . . . predicaments I used to have."

"Shinichi . . . " she whispered, feeling the familiar tingle beneath her eyes again. His form blurred before her and she had to blink several times to free the tears.

"Ever since, I've tried . . . to know more about you, to get a sample of the drug so that maybe there was a way to find a counter-drug. But nothing worked. I had few people to turn to, few people to confide in. I couldn't even confide in Ran, for fear that I might put her in danger. And I didn't want to think of it as being because of me. For all the trouble that caused . . . I guess it did nothing to protect her. Instead, all it did for her was make her suffer."

"But it was worth it," she said softly, so softly that even her oppressors didn't seem to hear. But Shinichi turned to her, and she raised her eyes to meet his questioning ones, her soft smile being all the explanation she could give him at the moment.

He seemed to understand that, and turned back to Gin. "She's just as good an actress as my mother. I heard what she said. About making it up, pretending about the phone calls. The only reason I didn't knock the gun out of your hand the first time, Gin, was because you fired too soon for me to react. It's only bad luck for you that she managed to dodge it. Now you know that was a lie. Kudo Shinichi isn't dead. And until you came along, Edogawa Conan had no place in this world. But you came. And that's all I've got to say."

Gin's grin resounded itself on his lips. "Good. Tell you what: I've decided I won't shoot you. Yet."

The other three raised their heads in alarm, and none of the expressions appeared hopeful in the least. That was to be expected on the first, and the other two were too smart to know what kind of intentions this world was filled with.

"What you've said intrigues me greatly, Detective. Enough so that I think it's worth reporting. And since I'm feeling nice today - " Shinichi couldn't help but snort at the probability of that " - I'll take you along with me. Besides, it's always easier to believe something when I've got proof – you should know that. And what better proof of a transformation than exactly that, in front of an audience?"

He was going to use the apo-toxin on Shinichi again, and there was no way of transforming back. Shinichi swore under his breath but followed Vodka's lead out of the alley. He could almost feel the eye of the gun boring a hole on their backs, as if that empty eye held a menace that possessed its own, cold-metal danger.

They trudged a block in almost-resigned lifelessness. Almost, but not quite. Shinichi slowly counted the steps. By now, Gin would've let his guard down just a smidgeon, and he had a feeling that, wherever they were taking them, they still had a long way to go unless he had any say in it. His eyes wandered over to Ran. Her blue-purple eyes rose from the ground to his, and in the second that the look passed between them, she realized what he intended to do. A nod, with a grin as indistinct to match, and she dropped to her knees onto the cold pavement, sending Gin, who had guarded her as closely as he had Shinichi with the gun, stumbling over her and sprawling to the ground.

Shinichi tackled him, grabbing the wrist that still clutched the gun ever-so-tightly in an attempt to arrest it. Ran picked herself up and grabbed Vodka by the wrist, twisting it so it made her captive cry out, and pinning it high on his back. With that, she forced him to kneel onto the pavement, Ran digging her knee onto his spine in a way she knew was painful. Shinichi was having no such success with the more sinister of the twoCrap, I so should've taken karate with Ran when I had the chance, he thought, trying to wrestle the gun from Gin. Even if the blonde terror was lying on the ground, facing the pavement, all those years with a gun were earning their keep at the moment. Gin squeezed the notch one more time, grinning at the beloved sound of the bullet bursting out of the barrel.

A wisp of smoke erupted from the cloth of Shinichi's left shoulder, but that was all. The second that Gin's index finger had hooked onto the notch was the same one that his strength gave out in a final, stillborn wish. Shinichi grabbed the gun and got up, nodding at Ran, who abated the pain on Vodka's arm and stepped back. Vodka actually found himself thankful that now there was only a gun pointed at him instead of the expertise of well-practiced muscle, especially Ran's. Gin's eyes narrowed in hatred at Shinichi, as if promising to not it end like this. But that was an empty promise. Behind those narrowed, icy eyes, he knew it was too late.

"Edogawa Conan had no place…" repeated Ran in a whisper, bringing up what he had said. "Shinichi - "

He cut her off, knowing what she was going to ask, and knowing that she already knew the answer to her question. But he answered anyway, because she had asked to be consoled. "I'm Edogawa Conan."

This time, she ignored the objections of her reason, believing instead in her faith in someone who stood for the truth. After all, a small part of her heart had been whispering the exact same thing ever since Shinichi had left her life to make room for Conan all those months ago.


	3. A Little One on One

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

Roundin' Up the Bad Guys—Along with a Little One-on-One

"But it wasn't all a lie," said Ran quietly, interrupting the somehow half-tense, half-companionable silence around them.

"Hm?"

"You were talking about how I pretended that I made up the stuff about the phone call and the visits. That part was true but when I think about it, even if you had . . . you know . . . died . . . the phone calls and the visits probably would've still happened, at least to me."

His steady footfalls stopped as he turned to face her. "What do you mean?"

"Because I would've made them up anyway, and they would've become reality."

"Because you love me." His straightforwardness was so unexpected that she was caught speechless for a moment.

They had ushered Gin and Vodka to the police. Inspector Megure had come right away once he heard Shinichi's voice on the phone. Shinichi blurted out all he knew about the organization his captives had been in, with the exception of the reason for his disappearance. He didn't think he wanted to tell anyone yet, except Ran.

"The government's had us keep the Kurozukume a secret for a long time, but I guess it's only rational to tell you who it is you're dealing with. Those two may give us a clue about their whereabouts. Count on you to bring the crooks right to the police station, Kudo," a grinning Inspector Megure had said.

Shinichi grinned. "Actually, Ran did most of it. I just pitched in to help."

"Really? Is this true, Ran-kun?"

The stout man turned to the girl sitting on the bench, her head bent in reflection.

"Ran?"

"Mm?" she raised her head, her eyes leaving her clasped hands for Shinichi's and Inspector Megure's puzzled expressions. She laughed nervously. "Oh, sorry, I was thinking about something else."

The orange-clad inspector thought he understood and glanced at his wristwatch. "Whoa, sorry. In all the excitement of seeing you after so long Kudo, I've lost track of the time. You two can head on home, you're probably tired."

Shinichi didn't reply nor take his concerned eyes off of Ran, whose gaze had once again returned to her hands. It was almost in slow motion that she raised her head to meet him again, her eyes assuring him that it was nothing to worry about, their owner getting up and following Shinichi out the door.

She couldn't help but smile. "You'll always be that cocky, won't you?"

"Well, you do." His teasing grin flashed in the uncanny brightness of the moon.

_I do,_ she thought, blushing furiously when she realized what this would indicate in different scenario. "I mean, because you're my best friend and all, it'd be so boring without you," she added hastily, starting to walk again, careful to keep her eyes on the moonlit sidewalk and nowhere else.

"Right. Because I'm your best friend." His tone was drenched in skepticism. "Ran, you admitted it to Conan, and you know that I'm Conan. So why can't you admit it to me?"

"Shut it, you," she said, elbowing him in the ribs. "Besides, I wouldn't be that comfortable with myself if I were you. Speaking of Conan, you still have to spit out the whole story . . . and why you didn't trust me enough to think I would keep a secret."

"Ran, I –"

"Save it." She stopped but didn't turn to him as she murmured, "You'll need the night to think your facts straight."

He raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "All right, whatever you say. Come by after school tomorrow."

This time, she turned to him, sharply, her eyes wide and a hint of a smile on her lips. A part of her had guessed that Shinichi was here to stay, but the other part – the afraid part – had warned her to not hope too much. "So the case is –"

She stopped as he shook his head. "No, the case isn't over yet, but we're getting there. By now, you would've already guessed what the case is."

She nodded quietly as he continued, "The people working with those two guys would want to know who had turned them in, who had exposed their operations. They won't rest until they find out, and when they do, we're in for it." She didn't say anything, and he continued, "Even if we've told the police, the Black Organization would know, and they would try to escape. I have to track them down before they do anything in retaliation."

She raised her chin decisively, almost defiantly. "I'm helping."

"No," he said sharply.

"Yes," she returned, just as sharply. "Or are you afraid I might get in the way? Tell me the truth, Shinichi."

"It's not that, it's never that," he answered after a moment's pause, and even though he averted his eyes, Ran could tell he was telling the truth. "It's just that you might get hurt –"

"As you might," she said, a spark of triumph in her voice. "Look, whatever can happen to me can and probably will happen to you. I don't want to sit around and twiddle my thumbs knowing you might be in danger."

"Now you know why I didn't tell you about before?

She opened her mouth to speak, groping for a word in reply, anything. None came.

He gripped her shoulders, locking his gaze with hers.

"You do care about me, Ran. Don't you think I know? Remember, I was Edogawa Conan. I still am, in the sense that whoever worked with those men is still a threat to me. I saw your tears. I knew what caused them, and I couldn't forgive myself knowing that it was me. But even so –"

"– you couldn't tell me. Why?" she asked, her eyes shining with tears. "If you knew how much I missed you, why didn't you say anything?"

"I did say things. But words from Conan just weren't enough. And I could only tell you so much over the phone. I couldn't tell you my true identity because I know you, Ran. I knew what you would try to do. And I would rather die myself than watch you risk your life for me."

He caught a tear cascading down her cheek with his finger. And whispered so softly he didn't know if she could hear it, "I love you, Ran." _And I always will…_

She started in surprise. "W-what?"

Shinichi smiled. "You heard what I said."

She looked at him, still disbelieving. They stood in silence as the tide of centuries dragged by, and then she finally relaxed, smiled through her tears, and buried her face into his shoulder, not able to hold it back any more. The long, lost nights, the pain and the silent anguish, the memories and dreams that could only console her so much all washed away with the tears evaporating into the stars.

She didn't know how long they stood there like that, the streetlamp casting them into the light, with Shinichi holding her close as she cried into his shoulder, as if to protect her from anything that would be flung their way. His fingers stroking her hair were already enough; but his whole being so close to her, holding her for both their sakes, for the sake of seventeen years' memories that was meant for this day . . . she swore she could feel rather than hear his heart beating.

Finally she raised her head and wiped her face with the back of her hand. "You know what?" she said, "Actually, I think I would like to hear it."

"Hm?" Reluctantly, he let her go.

"About the whole Conan thing, and why you always tried to keep me from figuring it out."

"What is it?" she asked after five minutes of staring at the kitchen table and not a word from either of them.

"What?" he propped an elbow on the table and inserted his chin into his hand, his other hand.

"You look like you want to ask me about something."

"I just can't get used to you accepting the stuff about Conan so readily."

"Well… I'm still waiting for your explanation." She grinned. "Don't forget, Shinichi. I had suspected Conan as being you before, but you always managed to work your way out of it. And despite . . . despite a lot of things . . . I think a part of me did suspect. The rest of me just never gave in to it. The rest of me just didn't think it was possible. But it's possible, and I should've given in before."

He nodded. "But it's partly my fault, too, Ran. If I hadn't been so damned careful – and a wonderful mess that's gotten us into –"

"– it _is _a wonderful mess though, isn't it?" She asked, meeting his eyes and grinning.

He stopped and, once he caught her meaning, grinned back. He took time before answering, looking at the house he hadn't entered for months – a house filled with all sorts of dust-bunnies no matter how much Ran dropped by to keep it in order. And then he looked down at his hands, hands slightly larger than Ran's. The long fingers, the neatly trimmed fingernails, the wrist that had lengthened the circumference of his stun-gun wrist-watch by several notches, hands that only last week had sent gripping a pencil above way too easy, first-grade kanji practice sheets that were made messy with more effort than the other way around. Oddly, it was those hands that gave him the most relief at being "back". Then he looked at Ran. No, it wasn't his hands that gave him the most relief, the surest proof that he was most certainly back.

Her blue-purple eyes sparkled in the dim light given from the single lamp he had turned on, and the shadow of lock of her hair cast a temporary scar across her cheek. That scar had him written all over it, just like her eyes and her smile did. That scar was her loss, but from every loss, there was always a gain. All of this. He had done it all for her. Words raced across his mind and underneath them all was Ran. Ran. He opened his mouth to tell their meaning, but shook them off in the last minute without really knowing why. But he had learned to trust his instincts when it came to danger. He would trust them when it came to the light as well.

Instead, "Definitely."

A satisfied silence. Then, "So?"

"So what?"

"So who else knew?" She began to answer her own question, ticking off names with her fingers. "Dr. Agasa did, because Conan – er, you – was with him the first time I came across him . . . and he covered up for you way too many times to have it have been a coincidence. And your parents did . . . your mom covered up for you once . . . and Heiji did! That was why he was always calling Conan – you – 'Kudo' every time he mentioned him, er, you. He probably figured it out by himself since to be honest, you make a better detective than a liar. Did anyone else know?"

"Yeah. Ai."

She raised her eyebrows. "I know you have a good reason for telling her."

"I do have a good reason. I didn't. She knew it herself."

Shinichi didn't need to hear her "Wha?" to explain. "No doubt you know those two men were the ones that turned me into Conan."

She nodded.

"They were making an illegal trade or something, and I snuck up on them. One of them – Gin – came up behind me when I wasn't looking and hit me over the head with something. They force-fed me some pill while I was still paralyzed. When I woke up, I trapped in the body of a six-year-old kid, namely myself, except about ten years younger."

"And then," she picked up, "you went to Dr. Agasa for help. Then I arrived. And the rest is as I know it. So where does Ai fit in? And how did she know who you were without you telling her?"

"I'm getting to that," he answered. "See, Haibara-san is like me. She also took the same pill, APTX-4869, that turned me into Conan."

Her eyes widened, but she didn't say anything.

"Her real name is Miyano Shiho, and she used to be in the same organization as Gin and Vodka. Gin killed her older sister and was going to kill her too, but she took the drug she herself made, to kill herself. Instead, it turned her into pretty much the same thing it turned me into."

"She made it…? So that was why she seemed so much like you . . . " she whispered to herself. "So then . . . "

"It was also Ai-kun who made the antidote, this morning."

"And you went to Dr. Agasa's house to get it."

He nodded.

"And, knowing you, you were eavesdropping on me when I was on the phone. You took the antidote after dinner and followed me."

He nodded again, this time smiling. "Sounds like me."

"Sure does," she agreed. "You know what else sounds like you?"

He jumped in his seat, blue eyes wide, at the ominous sound of a fist slamming onto the table, leaving a trail of smoke on the ill-fated wood with a dent to match. The flash of mischief in her eyes out-ruled the makeshift scowl on her lips – Ran never scowled naturally.

"If I remember correctly, didn't a certain little boy hear very, very frequently from a certain nee-chan of his that when a certain friend of hers came back from wherever the certain heck that certain he was, that certain she would pound the certain crud out of that certain him?" She jumped onto the table, aiming a kick at Shinichi's black hair.

"Crap," he muttered as he put two feet's worth of distance between him and Ran, diving under the table in hopes of a very brief barrier between the menace he hadn't counted on.

"I'm guessing it _does_ ring a bell." She was already after him almost before her feet touched the carpet.

Her vacant chair yielded itself as he crawled out from under the table, tipping it over and losing a flip-flop to his hurry. He took the stairs three at a time, yelping and encouraging his speed along when Ran chucked his lost flip-flop at the back of his head.

A slam of the door as he ducked into his room, followed by the muffled sound of feet on the stairs as she hurried after him. The opening of the previously slammed door, and the slamming of that same misfortunate door.

"Stay still!" Obvious frustration tinged her voice as he leapt from the bed to the desk to the floor, doing whatever he could to duck her onslaught of fists.

"Now why would I want to do that?" he wondered, grinning again at her vain attempts even though he knew that her experience would get the better of his luck sooner or later.

She stopped and planted her fists on her hips. "Because you know it's useless, Shinichi!" She could have read his mind.

"Um . . . " his eyes wandered to the door, " . . . love to stay and chat, but I gotta run away from a maniacal freak right now. Bye!" He breached past enemy lines, opened the door, slammed it and leapt down the stairs before she could utter out a peep in protest.

Ran was speechless for a moment, and then her face assumed the annoyed mask with which she had started the predator-prey war, given away only by a twinkle in her eyes that bespoke delight. "Shinichi . . . " she muttered, starting to go after him when the contents of a drawer in his bed stand, that had probably come loose during the roughhousing, caught her eye. She opened the drawer, picking up the single inhabitant within. "Shinichi . . . " she whispered again this time without any of the annoyance as before, caressing the wonderful name with her voice. Her features had softened to the ones that would be rightfully called Mouri Ran's and the twinkle within her eyes thrived into an all-out glow. _Maybe I'll let this slide…just once._

Shinichi had been catching his breath on the couch when she walked into the living room. With a yelp he ducked behind the couch.

"Relax. I've decided to be nice and forget about the whole 'promise to grind your bones to make my bread' thing. For now."

He sighed in relief, tumbling back onto the couch from the back. Then he sat up, eyebrows raised in question. "Why the sudden mercy?"

She sat down beside him, meeting him square in the eyes. "Where'd you get this?"

He took the picture from her hand, crimson coloring his cheeks when he realized which one it was.

"Um . . . "

That was all the answer he cared to give at the moment as a small, reminiscing grin touched his lips. It was a picture of Ran, taken about two years ago, a year before the Conan incident. They had been visiting Shinichi's parents then, all the way in New York. Her smile back then was every bit of Ran as it was now, only now, there was a lot more within it. It was amazing how someone could change in only a year's time. The Ran before him, looking at him with one eyebrow slightly raised in question . . . she was just so much _more_ than the one in the picture. And he loved the one in the picture to no end. The real-life Ran was exactly the same, only with more. She had gained so much… and she had had already more than enough to start. So how much exactly, did he love her now? He could only hope that he would solve _that_ particular mystery . . . someday.

He glanced at Ran before him, who was trying to guess what he was thinking. Her head was slightly tilted to one side, her hair brushing gently against her cheek on the other. She was so . . . amazing. He had unbelievably high ambitions if he truly wanted to know how much he loved her. No, he didn't need a definite answer. Just loving her was enough. Just loving her this much. This mystery. After all, some mysteries were made to remain unsolved . . . only admired forever, and loved even longer. He had done the latter two faithfully, and he knew he always would. And he wouldn't need to solve her someday. She would always keep him guessing. You could live a lifetime and not realize how much someone meant to you. He was sure glad that he did . . . just a hint of the truth.

"I thought your mom had it," she said, when he gave no other explanation.

"I think she guessed that I wanted it," he finally answered gently. She made a small noise, half in confusion, half in surprise that would register several seconds later into a delighted gratefulness. He answered by smiling softly in amusement, taking her hand into his and circling his other arm gently around her waist.

Ran met his gaze, looked into the eyes she had known for most of her life, had known even before that. Eyes revealing a soul that had been made partly for her, a soul that would always be the way she saw it now, because that soul possessed Shinichi. She squeezed the hand that held hers and rested her head on his shoulder.

She whispered into his ear, "Whatever's going to happen, let it. I'm ready."


	4. The Joys of Friendship

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

The Joys of...Friendship

"Geez, you're early," he said as Ran crossed the street from her house after a glance at his watch, the same one that had helped him so many times when he was still trapped within Conan.

"Like you're one to talk," she countered. It was true. He had been glancing beyond the white "Mouri Kogoro Detective Agency" sign, plastered over the windows to the living/agency room, for five minutes already. "And I was expecting to wait for _you_."

_And hoping it was really real,_ she added silently.

"Well, there was something I wanted to ask you about. We never came across it last night."

"Same here."

He grinned. So many questions, between someone he thought he had known so well and by the look in her eyes, she seemed to have the same thought. Of course, it should've been no surprise, really. They had hardly talked as Shinichi and Ran for about a year now.

"You first."

Ran's feet automatically starting in the direction of Teitan High. "The kids. Ayumi, Genta and Mitsuhiko. Do they know?"

"No. The only person I thought about telling was you. " He stole a glance at her, cherishing her smile.

"Will you tell them?"

"Certainly not now, I don't think. Maybe when they get older. For now, let's just say that Conan returned to America."

"I'm sure Ayumi will be devastated." Her remark was accompanied by a teasing grin.

"Well . . . she'll have time to heal. Besides, I know you'll always be there to offer support for the little girl."

"Oh?"

"Sure. You know you can't stand to see anyone sad, if you can help it."

She didn't know how to reply to that. Instead, she addressed the other person on her mind. "Um . . . what's to happen to Ai? I mean, Shiho?"

"What about her?"

"Isn't she going to be a target for those people as well?"

"The Kurozukume?"

Ran recalled last night at the police station, and nodded. "Yeah, them."

"They're not going to have as easy a job at finding her as you might think. She's decided to remain as Ai."

She stopped and turned to him. "Are you serious?"

"Dead serious. She's made too many enemies as Miyano Shiho, and she's decided to relive her life as someone else, since that option's open to her now. Ai's happier than Shiho has been in a long time."

She nodded, realizing for the first time what a life the blonde must have had. But then again, her own wasn't exactly dull, either. Not with Shinichi in it.

"So," he went on with a mischievous grin, "you'll be better off worrying about me."

"Shinichi, you're seriously asking for it . . . " she raised her fist.

"What?" The blankness was so apparent, it almost seemed feigned. _No,_ Ran decided, _it was feigned._

"Ohhh, that is it!" The fist came, but Shinichi was ready for it. He ducked just as it crashed into the wall and grabbed it upon impulse.

"Shinichi! Let go!" She tried to pull her hand from his, blushing furiously.

"You didn't say please," he taunted, enjoying it all.

"Please, you jerk!" She regained possession of her hand as she tugged it out of his grasp. She glared at him, but the glow within her eyes was anything but his imagination. She started to walk again, quickly, looking at anything but him as she tried to hide her still scarlet cheeks. "Uh, we'll be late if we don't hurry."

"If you say so." He smiled, amused at her feeble excuse. At this rate, they would make it to school with plenty of time to spare.

Several minutes of silence ensued. "So what did you want to ask me?" Ran finally asked.

"What you said last night, when I was explaining to them why I wasn't dead. About how it was worth it."

"Oh, that." She smiled, the smile he had seen last night in the light of the streetlamp, the smile he had seen before as Conan, whenever Ran thought about Shinichi – that smile was proof itself that she cared about him. "Didn't you feel it too?"

He was about to ask what she meant by that when three girls ran up to them, unconsciously pushing an indignant Ran aside. "E-excuse me . . . " one of them began, clutching a notebook to her chest, and the day's newspaper in her other hand. He could make out a picture of himself on the page that had been folded back. "K-kudo-sama?"

He nodded uncertainly. "Yeah –"

The rest of his sentence, if there was one, was drowned out in a single scream of glee uttered from three voices. "Will you please sign our notebooks, Kudo-san?"

Three identical notebooks and a pen were thrust into his face before he could answer.

"Back to life as Kudo Shinichi, every girl's heart throb," he heard Ran mutter as she leaned against the wall, and the detective shot her an impertinent smirk. She stuck her out tongue in reply and returned to watching the busy street before her with the air of one who had grown up seeing it everyday.

After the girls had scurried off, Shinichi turned to Ran. "You can never get used to it, can you?"

"What do you think? Who can?" she shot back.

"Jealousy ruins, you know," he teased.

"Who says I'm jealous? And even if I was – which I'm not – who says you're one to talk?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know what it means."

He couldn't think of a smart reply to that, and diverted that part of the matter elsewhere. "Besides, it'll end, after –" He had bite his tongue to stop the words.

"After what?" she asked, turning around sharply.

"N-never mind," he answered, blushing as furiously as she had only minutes before.

Then she changed to a far more important subject, asking him in a quiet voice that didn't subdue her unhappiness, "But next time, if something happens to you again – "

"You'll be the first to know," he answered right away. "You have my word, Ran. Because you've given me a reason." _And I can't stand being that far away from you for a second time._

Her smile returned, unbridled in its beautiful glory, a glory he knew he would never get tired of, no matter how many times he saw it. "Thanks."

_No, thank you, Ran. Thank you for . . . everything,_ he thought, knowing he didn't need to say it. Just the thought would be enough for her.

Shinichi stifled a yawn as he looked out of the window. Math was extremely boring, as usual, and being a year behind everyone else didn't stimulate his interest in the least. The school put him in his classes according to his age, ignoring his lack of real education for about a year. They were familiar with Kudo Shinichi's well-harnessed abilities. He had always been clever enough to grasp almost anything that came his way, and caught on quickly, like he always had. Anything practical, that was.

And life wasn't made of practicalities. Neither was Ran. "It was worth it," her words, accompanied by the way she said them despite the situation they were in, haunted him. And then, when she was about to answer, all she said was, "Didn't you feel it too?" Gee, thanks. That did nothing to ease his confusion. He waited until the teacher waded from his area of the classroom to the blackboard before scribbling something on paper and tearing it out, slowly, so nobody would notice the noise. He folded it into two and tapped Ran on the shoulder. She turned around and whispered, "What?"

For a reply, he handed her the note and watched over her shoulder as she turned back to the desk and read underneath it.

**-Hey, do you want to come over after school?-**

**-Okay, but you could've waited until lunch to ask me**,- she replied by pen and deposited it on his desk behind her, pretending to read the blackboard all the while.

Everyone had been ecstatic about Shinichi's return, and had pestered him for a full ten minutes before class, begging him to tell them every detail. With Ran's help, he had pulled it off, but barely. Something about working on a case and then going to Los Angeles, he remembered. Then they wanted to know every detail of the case, wanted to know why it took him so long, and would've chattered on to High Heaven if the bell hadn't rung.

And for the first time, it seemed, Shinichi was glad it rang, both because it saved him from an awkward situation, and because the peal somehow finally announced something he had been a little afraid to believe. It seemed so unreal, that after all the struggle, all the hope mingled with despair, he had finally made it: had finally transformed back into and unto his seventeen-year-old self. Permanently. And even after the declaration of the school bell, he realized it did nothing to settle his anxiety, well-buried but present.

"Pinch me," he said to Ran as everyone took his or her seat.

"What?" she asked, bewildered.

"Pinch me," he repeated.

"Should I ask why?" she wondered as she obliged, on his arm.

"Just to make sure this whole thing's real," he answered, with a wink.

She laughed, and after some thought, said, "Then pinch me too."

He reached out a hand to her wrist, and then stopped. "How do I know you're not going to punch me again?"

"Trust me, after what happened . . . uh, last time I tried, I won't," she answered, her cheeks lightly flushed as she recalled the episode on their way to school.

"As you wish."

"You're certainly spry today," observed Sonoko as she deposited a piece of shrimp into her mouth, chewing with a triumphant smirk on her face. "Since Shinichi-kun's back in your life and all."

"I am," she answered calmly. "I'd feel the same way if you suddenly returned after disappearing for months."

She chuckled. "Would you really. Who're you trying to fool? I've seen the way you look when you talk about him."

"Who?"

"Ran! You know who I'm talking about."

"You mean Shinichi?" she continued innocently.

Sonoko rolled her eyes. "Yes I mean Kudo-kun. Now are you happy simply because he's back in your life again, or did you finally confess, or did something go on between you two that I don't know about?"

Ran chewed and swallowed before replying, "I've no idea what you're talking about, Sonoko-chan. Shinichi was never out of my life."

Sonoko snorted in frustration.

_Well, he wasn't,_ Ran thought to herself but didn't say out loud. And by that, she didn't just mean Conan. He walked across her memories, dreams, always, even when his physical self wasn't there. And weren't memories and dreams part of everyone's life?

Suddenly Sonoko abandoned her scowl for a smile constructed too widely for Ran's comfort. "No matter, I'll find out soon enough, Ran-chan!"

Ran bit her chopstick in apprehension.

"I'll ask the celebrity himself!" exclaimed the girl as she saw Shinichi detach himself from his guy friends and walk over to the desk where they were having lunch. "So, Shinichi-kun," she began before Ran could say anything in protest, "anything new? Other than the incidents during your long escapade from us, leaving poor Ran-chan to fend for herself all alone?"

"I have no idea what the heck you're talking about," he replied blankly as Sonoko facefaulted.

"Heh, well, you two did spend too much time together from the start," she muttered as she picked herself up. Just when Ran thought that she would give up, the relentless interrogator took her seat and asked Shinichi with the forwardness both Ran and Shinichi knew all too well, "Shinichi-kun, d'ya like Ran?"

"Sonoko!" groaned Ran. "Could you have said that any louder!" Several heads turned at her outburst, and she couldn't help but turn even more scarlet at their probing glances.

Shinichi thought a moment and shrugged, answering casually, "Sure, I like Ran."

Sonoko grinned in triumph while Ran buried her face, which had become redder still, if

that was even possible, into her hands.

"She's a pretty cool friend, if you can overlook how incredibly naïve she can be."

Both girls facefaulted. As soon as Ran picked herself up, she kicked him and stalked off.

"What have we learned today, Shinichi?" he muttered to himself as he clutched his ankle in pain.


	5. Journeys

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

Journeys

"Don't try to hide it from me," remarked Ran, her footfalls in exact rhythm with his.

"You didn't mind school _that _much. I actually caught you listening to the teacher a couple of times."

"You were watching me!" he said, his mischievous grin once again festering across his lips.

Ran turned pink. "Of course not. I just…you know, noticed."

"Oh, right," agreed Shinichi as he nodded. "Since it was so easy to see me with those eyes in the back of your head and all."

"You would think that about me, you jerk," she muttered. " 'She's a pretty cool friend, if you can overlook how scary she can be sometimes.' Gee, thanks. That really made me feel appreciated. Besides, you're more likely to have eyes in the back of your head than me, considering all the snooping you do."

"Snooping! I'm making my career here!" he protested. "Besides, would you rather I admit the truth in front of everyone? Because once you tell Sonoko something, you might as well have told the world."

She thought about it a moment, and sighed resignedly, smiling. "You're right, as usual. Thanks. Just…don't get used to it."

He returned her smile and asked, "Don't get used to what?"

"Hiding the truth. You're a detective. Your job is to reveal it. Besides, even if you weren't one, you might make lying a habit. And trust me, if you keep it up, one of these days you'll regret it. If it's for a good cause, like the way you lied to me, which, I regret to admit, had a touch of sense in it, or if it was to protect privacy, or if it was because lying would be the only way to defend yourself, then it's okay. But it's nice to refrain from it…because the truth is something that makes our lives. That's your motto, isn't it? 'There is always only one truth.' Or, at least, that's how I interpret it. I know all too well that sometimes it hurts, or can harm, but the hurt or harm you receive if that lie remains what it is is so much greater eternally, because it can damage your own spirit, and maybe others around you too, if you care for them or if they care for you. Besides, sometimes the truth can heal. Our truth did. And sometimes, although rarely, the truth can be better than anything we could hope for dreams to be. At least, that's what I think." She grinned softly to herself as her own words echoed in her mind: _The truth can be better than anything we could hope for dreams to be._

_That's my Ran…_ he thought to himself. Then he remembered what she had said before, something so like this, and one of the reasons she was coming over. He would save that for later. "You know…it wasn't all a lie."

"Hm?" She turned to him. Didn't she just say the same words last night?

"Or at least, I didn't try to make it a lie. When I called you and told you it was a really big case, it _was_ a really big case. A case that still hasn't been completely solved."

Her only reply was a slow nod and a flash of decisive eyes, but he saw more in them than if she had spoken. _The case isn't completely solved, yes, and I'm going to help you solve it, even if it meant risking my life, and more importantly, yours. Whether you like it or not. Because if we don't solve it, you might as well have died. I know you, Kudo Shinichi, and I know your degree of determination. And it surprises me. It always has. You will leave nothing unsolved if you can help it, and as long as it's done by humans, you can always help it. It's in your power. It's in your will. It's in you, and you are Shinichi. And I won't ever let you die._

They walked the final block in silence, each basking in his or her own thoughts. He unlocked and opened the gate that had obstructed him into getting into his own house on his first night as Conan and closed it shut behind them, not a word exchanged between the two of them in the companionable atmosphere. He was about unlock the door when he stopped and turned to her. "Thanks a lot, Ran."

She raised her eyebrows in a wonder short of surprise and smiled. She should've known he would see her so well. And that had nothing to do with being a detective. She dropped her school things on the couch, hearing the "beep" of the answering machine. "Shinichi—"

"I know, I know." He was already at the phone. He pressed the flashing green button, and soon Inspector Megure's voice filled the room. "Kudo-kun, good morning. I know you're at school right now, but when you get this message, please come to the police station as soon as you can. We need to conduct an interrogation with the two you brought in last night, and I want to make sure everything they say matches by your source."

"I'm coming too!" Ran had crossed the room to stand beside him. "You're gonna need a bodyguard."

Shinichi sweatdropped. "Why would I need a bodyguard during an interrogation?

Even if something _does_ come up, who's to say you're not gonna get scared? You're gonna need one more than me."

"I won't," she answered simply.

He cocked an eyebrow at her doubtfully.

"Shin_ichi_!" she protested. "I'm just trying to do my part. To make up for…for it all."

_'Besides, with you around, I know you'll be there for me if I do get scared. You've always been there for me, even as Conan._

"Ran, you don't need to make up for anything. Nothing was your fault—it was all me."

She glared at him—he found the way she pouted in that childish way adorable. He grinned, and sensing a small argument looming ever closer, resigned more than willingly. "Sure, why not. C'mon."

"Yes!" Her grin radiated a childish giddiness that amused him once again. She headed for the door after Shinichi, and stopped. "Hey, don't you think we should bring Ai along? She's bound to be helpful, since no doubt she knows a lot more about the Kurozukume than you do."

He nodded. "Yeah, as long as she's home. Let's go see."

Suddenly in a burst of impulsiveness--or rather, a burst of revenge for his months' absence--Ran stuck her foot in his way just as he was on his way out the door, laughing almost evilly as he hit the ground.

"Ran!"

"That's the first step to not provoking the karate fighter—don't provoke the karate fighter."

"You _tripped_ me. That had _nothing_ to do with karate!"

A little girl, aged six or seven or so—if one determined ages by outer appearance only—stuck her head through the halfway opened door and acknowledged the visitor with a nod and a "Kudo" by way of greeting.

"Hey, Haibera."

Her eyes flickered to the person at his side and widened in shock and something that resembled a little of…fear? "Ran?"

Ran grinned, unaware of the other one's reaction. "Good, you're home."

Ai nodded, slowly, and glanced at Shinichi for an explanation.

"We're going to the police station to see if Gin and Vodka'll answer a few questions. Since you know a lot more about the Kurozukume than I do, it'd be better if you came, too."

Ai's eyes widened even more, with an open mouth to match. Although her expressions generally alternated between vaguely amused to nonchalant, Shinichi's easy words would falter anyone who had the sort of background she had.

"Uh, Shinichi, I think you just forgot to mention one vaguely important thing," chided Ran. To Ai, she said, "We'll explain it on the way to there. Inspector Megure said to come as quickly as possible."

Ai immediately closed the door behind her and slipped on her shoes, forgetting temporarily all her caution to Ran as she said, "Okay, I want to hear everything."

"Then we'll try to give you everything," she answered. "And thanks, Ai—Shiiho. For the antidote." She smiled softly at the younger-seeming girl on the doorstep. "And for everything. For helping Shinichi—er, Conan out on the cases, and helping him by pretending to be Conan when I suspected what was going on—" she turned sharply to Shinichi when he cringed "Yes, wonder-boy, I know she had to have been helping you on that one. She's the only one short enough who knows what's going on—no offense, Ai."

"None taken."

Ai vaguely wondered why it was Ran who was thanking her for what she had done for Conan/Shinichi, but shrugged. She knew what it was like to have feelings for someone—she just didn't know, with the sheer conviction Ran did, if those feelings were love. She walked a little behind the others, watching the way they walked together, as if they couldn't worry about anything as long as they had each other. She sighed, a hopeless envy making up a large portion of that sigh, an envy drenched in decision and a strange sort of rebirth. She had stayed Haibera Ai not only because of the Kurozukume, although that was the only reason she gave Shinichi. There was also another one—to tell herself that what Shinichi and Ran had—it wasn't for her. That was one of her envies. Their relationship, how they knew everything about each other but still found out new things every single day. It was no mystery to her that Shinichi loved Ran, enough so that she would always come before anything in his life, and that Ran loved Shinichi, enough so that no other guy would ever stand an inkling of a chance against Shinichi's mere memory. And there were other guys.

She had stayed Haibara Ai so that she could tell herself Shinichi wasn't for her. He had surprised her, time after time again, with his actions and his determination, and soon, her wonder at him turned into a fondness. But it also was no mystery to her if Shinichi returned her feelings or not—he only regarded her as a friend, and one of his confidants back when he was still trapped within Conan's identity. There was only room for one person to fill his heart, and because of that, she had avoided, maybe even feared, that one person. It was no surprise to her why Shinichi loved Ran so much…her optimism was contagious, her faith in him everlasting, her purity empowering to anyone who dared to feel it, like one steadfast river breathing life to all it touched, lifting life and soul into Heaven. And sometimes, no one could help but feel it. Ai had no place in Shinichi's mind, nor his heart, except as a friend.

Driving all these thoughts—strangers to a mind so rooted within science and practicality—into the darkest corners of her mind, where she wouldn't be able to feel them even if she wanted to (and she was certain she didn't) she said, "So how did you manage to catch them? Both of you look intact enough." That was a harsh understatement—both of them looked like the relatively ordinary teenagers they must have been a year ago. Inwardly, she marveled at their ability to forgive, but not forget. To look beyond, but also at.

"Ran received a call the day you gave me the antidote from Gin and Vodka, and I happened to be listening in. I realized something was up, so I waited until I heard Ran leave the house at around midnight to follow her."

"The two guys—Gin and Vodka—told me to go alone to the amusement park," Ran picked up. "They were planning to kill me. I think they had heard talk that Shinichi was still alive when according to them, it was obvious he wasn't. I guess they figured out sometime that I had started the talk, saying that he would call me every two weeks or so, and that I even saw him on some accounts. That got them suspicious, and they wanted to ask me a few questions. I lied my way through it and said that I had made it all up—it was a miracle they didn't find out that other people had seen him too, when he 'came back'—wait a minute. Shinichi, how did you transform back while you were Conan, anyway?" She stopped and looked pointedly at her best friend.

"Actually, I don't really know. The first time, I was sick and Heiji gave me that Chinese liquor. And the second time, it was when Haibera came up with the counter-cure…'though it only lasted a day." He shrugged.

"After I heard how the liquor changed his body back, I isolated the chemical that had really done the job, and then made it stronger. But obviously not strong enough—the only reason the liquor took any effect at all was because his body was already weak from the fever. Even though it was made several times stronger than at its normal state, the chemical still could only last him for a day."

"I guess if that's the best answer I could get…" Ran trailed off before continuing her short narrative to Ai, "Even if they believed me, they were still gonna kill me because I knew they were connected with Shinichi's 'death'."

"Before I could do anything, Gin had already fired. Somehow she managed to dodge the first bullet and before he could fire another one, she gave him a good one in the stomach. Then Vodka went at her with the knife, and that time I managed to kick the case they brought with them to knock it out of his hand. They were planning to force-feed the APTX-4869 to her, if they had the chance."

"Luckily they didn't," Ai inserted. "I only made one batch of the antidote."

"Why?" wondered Ran.

"So I don't tempt myself."

The two turned to her, eyebrows raised in almost the same half-concerned, half-curious expression, but she shook her head and said, "Never mind, go on."

Ran still looked at her questioningly, but a hint of understanding touched her eyes and she nodded. "While we were busy with Vodka, Gin had righted himself again and grabbed the gun. They said something about reporting the whole thing and were about to bring us to their boss, or whatever, but during that time I managed to trip Gin, and Shinichi got the gun from him. When Shinichi picked up the gun again—Vodka was out of commission because I was threatening to twist his arm off—" Here, Ai raised an eyebrow and Ran laughed.

"—she had him in a death grip—" volunteered Shinichi.

"—and that's basically it," topped Ran to the awkward explanation.

Ai looked from Ran to Shinichi to Ran again and raised her eyebrows. "Either now I have a vague idea of what's going on, or I'm more confused than I was before."

Shinichi and Ran looked at each other, both with a similar half-grin on their faces.

"You're more confused that you were before," said Ran.

"Basically, we kicked Kurozukume butt," said Shinichi.

"I guess I'll have to believe that," Ai answered.

They walked in silence for a few minutes before Ran ventured, "Ai…so you're really going to live your life over?"

The blonde girl nodded. "Even if my enemies stand a chance of being defeated, there's still so many memories I'd love to forget. Being Shiiho—it won't let me forget."

"But Ai…" murmured Ran softly. "Even if you have another identity now, you still have the same brain, the same memories, and that'll never change. Even if you are Ai now, you still can't forget."

Ai reluctantly pondered over this, running her tongue over her top teeth. "You're right. I won't forget. But Ai holds a better chance of a future to look forward to than Shiiho, as long as I don't let my true identity leak out to anyone. Except for those who already know."

"True, true. I never doubted your decision. After all, you've been through so much—if I was put into your shoes, I'd probably do the same thing," said Ran earnestly. "Although…do you want to forget about your family as well?"

"Them most of all. And my parents died in a car crash. They—" by "they", every one of them knew whom she was talking about "—killed my sister, Akemi, a few months ago," Ai responded flatly. "They were going to kill me, too."

"I-I'm sorry," said Ran softly, and her countenance and eyes looked it. "You loved your family, didn't you?"

Ai didn't say anything. Finally she nodded, slowly.

Ran broke into an encouraging smile. "Then you don't have to be afraid of

remembering."

"I'm not—" she cut herself off as she realized what Ran said was true. She _was_ afraid. But…how had that girl, drenched in the beautiful innocence she, Ai, had lost a long time ago—might've never even had in the beginning anyway—known?

Ran grinned embarrassedly. "At least, that's what I think. And I'm sure they did good things."

Ai nodded slowly. After awhile, she said, without any trace of bitterness despite the context of her words, "They did do good things. That was why they died."

"Mm?" she turned to her, blue-violet eyes saying clearly that she was there to listen if the other wanted to tell her.

"They were going to betray them. But then…they found out. The Kurozukume, I mean. Then they rigged the car crash and killed 'em."

Ran nodded, not saying anything. And that was enough for Ai.

"Guys…" Shinichi said suddenly as he realized something. "If we turned up with a seven-year-old at the police station, wouldn't Inspector Megure ask? And then…when we spill out the truth, Haibara…"

Ran sucked in her breath and said quickly, "He doesn't have to know. If Ai doesn't come, he would never ask, and no one would be the wiser. Ai, you may know a lot more about the Kurozukume than Shinichi, but we can—"

"No," Ai cut in sharply with a firm shake of her head. She heaved a sigh and muttered, "You're right…Ran. The past _is_ going to haunt me, whether I'm Shiiho or Ai. I need to pay for the crime I've done. Helping you catch the bad guys doesn't mean I don't have to face the consequences, just like anybody else."

"You're sure?" asked Ran.

Ai nodded. _Besides, there are other people who deserve to know the truth, too._

Shinichi cut in, "Well, it's too late for you to change your mind anyway, Haibera. He's spotted us."

True enough, they had reached the station earlier than they had thought, and the orange-clad inspector was hurrying their way.

"Kudo, what took you so long?"

"We had to bring Haibara," he answered, grinning at the inspector's bewildered expression. "Let's go inside, Inspector. This is going to take awhile."


	6. Investigations

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

Investigations

The explanation took about the better part of an hour, and they spent another thirty minutes answering the inspector's questions, with an additional ten minutes convincing him all of it was true. Even after that, he didn't seem completely convinced. So Dr. Agasa was asked to come in, and then out again to get all of Conan's discarded gadgets. (He later left in a huff when his services and his words did nothing to yield the inspector's confidence.) The watch Shinichi still had on his wrist—a souvenir of the event that changed all of their lives as well as a spiffy device to tell the time (with another more entertaining ability added to that)—whisked a confused officer off into slumber, the bowtie voice-changing mechanism was tested out by the inspector himself, and still there was no true evidence that what had happened had happened, although it was undeniable that all of Conan/Shinichi's victims mostly solved mysteries in the same manner—as if they were asleep. There was a sliver of a chance it could have all been coincidence, but as Shinichi had learned long ago, a sliver of a chance sometimes made the greatest difference. Finally Inspector Megure shook his head and sighed in resignation. "Fine, there's a chance your story is true, but I won't put any charges against Ai. First of all, to me, she still seems like a seven-year-old, at least to me—" at this, Ai scowled "—and putting her in jail just…well, it tugs at my conscience, and second of all, she _did_ help you out by making the antidote to the APTX thing, so I suppose that's punishment enough."

Shinichi and Ran, who had each been secretly considering force-feeding the inspector the aforementioned pill to diminish his doubts, regardless of the fact that there wasn't any antidote left, sat up in surprise. "O-okay…" they said simultaneously.

"Besides, there's more important things to get to," Megure said, getting up and opening a door on the other side of the room. Gin and Vodka sat in identical chairs, and this time, neither coat nor hat shielded their features. Instead, they wore the classic uniforms of prisoners, not to mention handcuffs that tied their hands behind the back of the chairs they were confined in.

"Gentlemen—" Shinichi, Ran and Ai raised their eyebrows at the unlikely association "—we'd like to ask you a few questions," began Inspector Megure.

"Shoot," muttered Gin. "Although you might as well as hell not, since we're not giving one damn thing away."

Ran cringed. Even after he was caught, the icy tone and devil-may-care countenance of Gin still retained its superiority, yielding in no way to shame, or despair, or humility. He didn't seem capable of those feelings.

"We'll see…Gin, was it? We'll see," said Inspector Megure, taking a notepad from his pocket and flipping to a page. He ordered for Vodka to be taken back to his prison cell for questioning after Gin, and waited until the officers that had accompanied him into the prisons returned and left the room, leaving only Shinichi, Ran, Gin, Ai, and Inspector Megure.

"Let's get started, shall we?" He took a seat behind a desk and motioned for the others to sit themselves on the bench along the wall. "First of all, how long is it since you and Vodka were first admitted into the organization?"

"Long time," answered Gin curtly.

"Please specify."

"Twenty, thirty years, I guess. Vodka got drafted five years after I did." It was useless to tell whether he was lying or not just by his expression or tone alone.

"So then you must know a lot about the Kurozukume," observed the orange-attired policeman.

When Gin gave no answer, nor any indication that he had even heard Inspector Megure, but the latter plunged on, not even daunted in the least. "How exactly is it run?"

"There's a leader. And he does the running," replied Gin in the same fashion as he had to the questions before, curtly, answering them completely, yet not giving any extra information away nor speaking a word more than he had to.

"I see…" muttered Megure, in a tone that implied just the opposite. "And who is this leader?"

Gin snorted and didn't answer.

"All right then, don't," he said complacently before turning to the three who sat, looking bored, on the bench. "Ai, do you know the name of this leader?"

"As a matter of fact, I do," answered the girl whose feet didn't even touch the floor to the inspector. However, her eyes were planted on Gin. Them, along with the smirk upon her lips, suggested that she was enjoying herself. ". Or at least, that's what they—and I—called him."

"Rum!" He looked from Ai, to Gin, to the locked door, obviously thinking about Vodka. "Uh, why are they all named after alcohol?"

"That was what I was wondering about, too," said Ran.

"Ditto," said Shinichi.

Ai shrugged, her eyes still on Gin, whose face had twisted into a very obvious display of fury and shock at the seemingly seven-year-old girl. "You—you're…!"

"You mean Sherry? Miyano Shiiho? Yeah, that's me," replied the smirking girl in an offhanded manner; however, her apparent delight at Gin's turn of expression conveyed otherwise.

"I should've noticed…should've known. You look way too familiar to give anyone a sound mind. You took that pill, didn't you? And that turned you small, which is how you've managed to escape us for so

long! You were the one who invented something to turn that detective brat back into himself, weren't you?"

"Excuse me, but I think _you're_ the one to be answering questions, not me," she replied, shifting her gaze from her sister's murderer to Inspector Megure. "Inspector, go on."

Shinichi briefly wondered how the policeman would feel about being bossed around by a seven-year-old, but he seemed to take it well enough.

"How many people are there in the organization?"

"Enough to bust me and Vodka out no problem," answered Gin without a second's hesitation.

"I was thinking about a number," Megure pointed out.

Gin shrugged. "Only our boss knows exactly how many there are."

Inspector Megure turned to Shinichi for confirmation, who turned to Ai, who shrugged again.

"Estimate."

"Fifty or so, I guess."

Inspector Megure scribbled something onto the notepad and asked, "Are they all around Tokyo, or are they in different parts of Honshu, too?"

"They're spread out across Japan, and some in other countries."

Megure set down his pen, his heavy mustache not quite hiding his scowl, and clasped his hands, gloved as always, over the notepad, glancing at Gin over them. "You know, Gin, if you give us any valuable information, you're let out of jail much earlier than otherwise, maybe even up to ten years in advance. So I'll ask you again: Where is your boss, this—" he glanced down at the notepad "—Rum guy?"

Gin didn't say anything. Right when everyone else in the room thought he wasn't going to answer, he said, "He's right here in Tokyo. There's a hotel on Beika Road—the Beika Hotel. Right now, the headquarters is at room 5079, and the office is in 5080."

Megure nodded, and from the way he grinned, he was obviously pleased with Gin's cooperation. "Thank you, and if all goes well, I'll see to it that you'll have an early dismissal."

Gin was taken away to his cell while Vodka entered the room and was chained to the same chair his former partner-in-crime had been contained in. Inspector Megure fired at him the exact same questions as he did Gin. It took another forty-five minutes or so to pry all the information from him, but they matched Gin's reasonably enough, and afterwards Vodka was taken away, too. Megure made sure that the footfalls of the prisoner and the officers accompanying him had died away before standing up and turning to Shinichi, Ran, and Ai. "Thanks to your work, kids, it seems we may be able to put a stop to the Kurozukume yet." Shinichi raised his eyebrows, Ran blinked, and Ai snorted at his term of address. After all it wasn't the policewho had invented the drug and counter-drug that had exposed the Kurozukume's illegal acts, nor was it they who caught two high-ranking agents of the aforementioned syndicate.

"I'll send out the majority of the Tokyo police force after them, and we'll finally put this case to rest," continued the inspector, not seeming to notice the others' reactions.

"Wait, Inspector Megure," said Shinichi, standing up. "I've a feeling you shouldn't do that."

Megure sighed and sat down in resignation. "And why not?"

"Gin mentioned before that there were enough people to bust them out of jail no problem, right? Well, if there is, why did he give you information on where Rum is after you said he would be out of jail plenty of years early? He could've been bluffing earlier, but isn't it strange that he would tell us Rum's whereabouts so readily?"

"But Kudo, both he and Vodka gave us the same answer. It couldn't have been made up," reasoned Megure in a tone that suggested he knew Shinichi was on to something. He only questioned to encourage the young detective further.

"True, but that could've been the last place Rum was. Remember, he's the leader of a syndicate, so he's got to move around a lot so as to not get caught, whether it's by the police or if it's by a company he's double-crossed or something. As to Gin and Vodka giving the same answer, maybe it was something they were told to say, just in case they might land themselves in a situation like this one." He jerked his thumb unnecessarily at the locked door leading to the prisons.

The hand went to his chin, his thumb and index finger forming the familiar sideways "L" shape the others knew so well. "It's just a hunch," he said to himself out loud "but maybe there's a reason for choosing the Beikan Hotel of all places. If you thought you were onto something, inspector, you said yourself you were going to send the majority of Tokyo's police force there. Maybe that would alert him, if there happens to be a bunch of police cars around the hotel, and he happened to see it, he would know something was up. Meaning that he, or someone working under him, would have to be near or at the Beikan Hotel. Anyone even moderately clever would try to use everything to his advantage. Everything. So the best way to go about this is to go there, and try to find some information about where he is, without alarming him."

Ran stood up. "Meaning you need an inconspicuous someone to go. And that would be me."

Shinichi turned sharply around. "No way."

Ran sighed. "Look, I said I'd help you bag every one of them in any way I can. And so far, I haven't done much."

"That's where you're wrong. If it wasn't for you, we would've never caught Gin and Vodka. Besides, you might get—"

"—hurt," Ran finished. "As you might."

An echo from last night. He sighed, shaking his head in resignation, drawing a laugh from Ran, who said, "Then it's settled."

"Ran, I'm coming with you," announced the only seated occupant of the room. "Besides, who's to suspect a little girl? I do look too much like…well, like myself, but just a little touch-up, and no one will notice." Ai forced a smile, and then realized that it was a true one. "Besides, the Kurozukume being what it is is partly my fault, and Kudo—" she glanced briefly at Shinichi, then turned back to Ran "—I give you my word that I'll protect Ran for you."

Both Shinichi and Ran turned scarlet, but they couldn't say a word in denial. There was a pause, and Ran finally said, hoping to avert the way the conversation was headed, "So…uh, when do we start?"

"I still can't see why I can't come," Shinichi said at the same time, with the same intention as Ran.

There was another lapse of silence. Ran broke it again, this time by herself, as she answered, "He-llo! You know, you _are_ Kudo Shinichi. You were on TV before, never mind the newspaper about twenty times! If I were the leader of the Kurozukume, I, for one, would at least touch myself up on what's going on in the world."

"Well…remember that time on the roller coaster? No one recognized me then…"

"I'm not sure if you want to take that chance again, Shinichi," she returned, in a tone that implied the end of discussion.

"Okay, fine," he said. "But you guys watch out, 'kay?"

"We'd better," said Ai in an undertone.

"So when do we start?" asked Ran again.

"As soon as possible, if we can manage it," answered Shinichi, still a bit reluctant.

"We can." Ran headed for the door.


	7. Confrontations

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

Confrontations

Several days passed, and still no indication of any information worth indulging over. Ran and Ai, the latter complete with a baseball cap and pig tails as a precaution, had stopped by the Beikan every day after school, casting a wary eye over its temporary residents and sometimes listening in on a conversation when anything invited their curiosity. Their job slowly became easier when, after a few days or so, Dr. Agasa and Ai developed fly-sized camera-slash-recorder-thingies and walkie-talkies. Still, Agasa/Ai Corp. could only do so much by way of technology. The rest were left up to the senses that God had bestowed upon just about every single human being.

"How about you take the double doors and I'll do the elevator this time," whispered Ran, already turning a corner to the elevators and taking a seat near them as she spoke, pulling a book from her pocket and pretending to read.

"Sounds good," came Ai's voice just beneath her ear. "Just don't finger that earring so much. You look like you're up to something. Which you are."

Ran grinned, although she knew her accomplice couldn't see it. "Sorry. I'm just so unaccustomed to an earring that talks. Besides—" she shook her head, the pearl clip-ons dancing under her ears "–why do they have to be so swingy?"

She heard a slightly crackled (on account of the static) laugh coming from the other end. "Trust me, from the way our level of success has been so far, you'll get used to those earrings." Silence. And then a gasp, followed by an all-too-loud "What the—"

"What? What happened? Ai!" she tried to keep her voice down as her hand went to her left ear again.

Near the double doors, Ai fingered the brim of her hat near her ears, realizing why Ran touched her earring so much. It was for reassurance. "N-nothing. I just thought I saw someone I used to know. But it's—it's nothing."

"Are you sure?" Ran's voice was wreathed in sympathy, not the pity she, Ai, had once feared would come from her once she knew her past. Ai smiled grimly. Back then, she didn't know Ran that well, did she?

"Yeah." Ai just wished she was as convinced as she sounded.

"Well, all right then." The seventeen-year-old still sounded like she was itching to soothe the elder's (although she certainly didn't look it) turmoil. The short-haired blonde grinned sadly as she remembered what had taken place on the way to the police station a few days ago, and she would have been surprised herself if she had known that within all of that sadness, there was no trace of the bitterness nor jealousy that she had often felt before whenever Conan, or anyone for that matter, mentioned Ran's name. It was hard to hate Ran, as hard as it was easy to like her. And sometimes it wasn't easy to like anyone. The girl was so compassionate, so selfless, so strong but so soft, innocent as a star with a soul several times as old. It wasn't her fault Shinichi loved her so much—and yet, in a way, it was.

This time, it was Ran who gasped loud enough for the other girl to hear, and Ai was broken out of her thoughts, grateful for the interruption. "Ran, what is it? Ran?"

She didn't answer, but touched her right earring this time, pressed her book to her face, and hoped that the person who had just turned the corner wouldn't notice her. The high-heels that clopped sharply upon the marble floor never broke their rhythm until they stepped into the open door of the elevator. Ran waited for the familiar ring of the elevator door followed by the sliding sounds of two heavy slabs of metal meeting each other before abandoning her book on her chair and staring at the closed elevator door the owner of the high-heels had disappeared into. Her gaze wandered above the sliding doors, where the numbers lit up with a faint yellow glow whenever the elevator reached the floor they marked.

"Ran! Ran! Answer me!" Ai pleaded for the umpteenth time, while still trying to keep her voice low.

"Sorry, but that was— " her voice stopped at her throat.

"Who?"

"That person you saw. Describe her."

"Glasses, pony tail, blonde hair, short green dress. Why?"

"That was Jodie-sensei."

"A teacher of yours!"

Ran nodded out of habit. "You said before that she reminded you of someone. Who? And was that person part of the Kurozukume?"

This time, Ai nodded. "What's she doing here? She can't be staying here, since she's been in Tokyo for quite a while now. So she's gotta be meeting with someone. Follow her just in case."

"But she can't be mixed up with those people, can she?" asked Ran, almost pleadingly. _She's my teacher,_ she added silently. However, she did as she was told and stepped into the other elevator. "Ai?"

The voice on the other end became cracked with static. _Shoot…_ Ran remembered. _You can't use these types of things in an elevator._

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, realizing it was all up to herself now. There had been two other people in the elevator with her English teacher, although they had all stopped at different floors. The yellow light had lingered on floors 12, 15, and 38 longer than the rest. She pressed their buttons and waited. Luckily, she was alone in the elevator, and she didn't need to feel conspicuous about her actions. The halls were long and almost devoid of turns, so it would be easy to spot anyone. The first two floors yielded no promising figure in a green dress, and she bit her lip. Floor 38 was her last hope.

Bingo. She spotted her teacher's retreating back at once, and slowly followed some safe twenty paces behind.

"Ai?" she whispered.

"Yeah? What happened?"

"Sorry about that. I've spotted her. Call Shinichi. He might be some help."

"I have. He's on the line right now."

"Ran?" Shinichi's voice sounded distant.

"Shinichi, Jodie-sensei's here, but she can't be involved with those people, can she?"

He took his time answering. "It could be a coincidence, but somehow I get the feeling it's not. She's pretty clever, you know."

Usually Shinichi's word was as true as gold, but not always. Ran hoped now was one of those times, even when another part of her agreed with him. Ever since the English teacher landed in Teitan High, she had had the feeling that someone was keeping her under close watch. And also—the thought made her stop in her tracks—there were only a handful of people who had known that Shinichi had kept contact with her when he was "missing". Sonoko talked openly to her about Shinichi's calls, so it wasn't exactly difficult for Jodie-sensei to catch on. But Gin had believed her—or had appeared to believe her—when she said that she had made all of that up. And Jodie-sensei herself had seen Shinichi at the school festival with her own eyes. What was going on?

"Where's she now?"

"She's stopping at a door. And now she's going into the room."

"Check the door number."

She nodded and quickened her pace while keeping her eyes fastened to the door her English teacher had disappeared into. "Room 3816."

"It's too early to suspect anything. Stick around for a while. She's bound to come out. Hide somewhere and don't do anything stupid."

"Shinichi!" she protested, a grin finding itself on her lips. She rarely did anything of the like, but both of them knew that she would have lost many a life due to the hastiness he had infected into her system if he hadn't been there to save her. Or maybe she was just unlucky in that way? Well, he certainly made up for that besetting misfortune, and inexplicably more besides.

There was a door across the hall with a window covering the upper part of it, unlike the others. A storage. She tried the knob, and, finding it open, ducked into the room to find that several cardboard boxes lined themselves in the narrow space. Taking a seat on one of them, she propped her arms up on her knees by the elbows and rested her head on her hands. "Got a soccer ball handy?"

"Yep."

"Get thinking. We're counting on you."

She stirred as the sound of a door closing reached her ears. Careful not to make any noise, she raised her head to the window and caught sight of someone leaving the same room her English teacher had entered half an hour ago. Blonde hair longer than Jodie-sensei's cascaded down the middle of the stranger's back, and the green dress had been abandoned for a crisp black one, but it was almost certain that this transformed woman was the Jodie-sensei of Teitan High. The way the high-heels bit the rug along with the confident rhythm with which the lady took her strides were exactly identical to that of the perky teacher that had often lectured Ran time and time again for one reason or another. The glasses were gone, revealing a face that held an undeniable beauty to it, and along with that beauty, a shadow of an evil grin. Gorgeous as this woman appeared to be, Ran couldn't help but shiver. It was as if someone had dumped a mountain of ice down the back of her shirt. The glint in the blonde beauty's eyes made her stiffen instantly, and she couldn't help feeling that this woman possessed a greater addiction to malice than even Gin.

_You did ask for this, you know,_ a voice inside her head said.

_And I knew what I was in for when I did,_ she shot back silently.

The footfalls faded into the distance, and she slowly opened the door after catching the sound of the ring of the elevator to see the right elevator's doors closing. She ran silently to it, her eyes glued to the top, where floor 14 was bathed in a brief yellow light.

"Ai?" she said, still keeping her voice low although no one was within proximity to hear.

"Yeah?" came the answer.

"Someone's come out of there, but it wasn't Jodie-sensei."

"Who was it?" The voice on the other end sounded frantic—Ran found herself bewildered by the change within the other girl's tone. "What did she look like?"

"Long blonde hair, cold smile, really pretty, short black dress—"

The "child" on the other end said a word that made Ran blink twice. "I'll try to call Kudo."

"So Jodie-sensei—" she began, unable to keep the hurt from her voice.

"I'm sorry, Ran. The woman you just saw—she's deceived us all before."

Ran didn't—couldn't—say a word in reply, but her disappointment didn't keep her from seeing her duty, nor that something out of the ordinary was going on with the panel above the elevator. Her blue-purple eyes widened, even when the elevator resurfaced from its brief anomaly and went back to the lobby.

"Ran?" Shinichi's voice offered more comfort than she could've imagined, just like in an occasion

that presented an uncanny similarity with this one. Although that time, it was also his voice that had caused her so much pain, when she realized that one of her favorite teachers had killed someone, back when Shinichi was still Conan.

"Mm?" she finally said.

"What's up?"

"Jodie-sensei came out again, but the person that came out wasn't her! I mean it was her, except different—I mean, she didn't look like her one little bit, but it seemed to be her—"

"Whoa, slow down. What're you saying?"

Ran took a deep breath and began slowly, "A woman came out of room 3816, but she didn't look anything like Jodie-sensei. But she _was_ Jodie-sensei—"

Shinichi cut her off as soon as she got that far. "Listen, don't do anything to try to go after her. Take the elevator back to the lobby and wait for me."

She smiled at the last three words despite the circumstances, cherishing the way he said it. The sinking feeling within her lightened its grasp of her, and all because of his voice. _I have for months, Shinichi._ "But be careful not to get recognized."

"I can disguise myself, like Haibera."

"All right, but don't bring the police just yet. The woman I saw came out of room 3816, but the elevator she was in…well, just get over here as quick as you can."

Ran pressed the "down" button and waited, her face to the floor as she digested the news Ai had given her. Jodie-sensei—a part of the Kurozukume? It seemed near impossible…that friendly, comical teacher who would mince English in with Japanese, sporting the coldness she detected within the woman she saw just a few minutes before? _ She's deceived all of us before._ The way Ai had spoken those words, plus the reaction she had had when she first saw Jodie-sensei entering the hotel…if Ran had doubted her feeling when she first saw that woman from the storage room, those would confirm them. She lifted a hand to her right earring, turning off the camera she had turned on in the lobby. Then her hand, without her mind realizing it, brushed against her right eye, coming away wet with memory and confusion.

She looked up, surprised that she had gotten into the elevator. She had no recollection of doing so. The thought returned to her. If Jodie-sensei was working with Gin and Vodka, why did Gin believe her, Ran, when she claimed she had made up Shinichi's calls, his visits? Jodie-sensei had seen him once with his own eyes, at the school play. But what other reason would there be for Gin and Vodka knowing what they did? No one really knew about Shinichi keeping contact with her, except for people close to her, like Sonoko. And Sonoko didn't see anything wrong with not keeping it a secret (as Ran didn't back then), so Jodie-sensei getting that sort of information wouldn't be a wonder. The image of the woman—she still refused to think of her as her teacher—returned to her. That smirk, that stride—it wasn't the smile of someone bent on killing whomever, like Gin. It also gave off the air of someone who was evil, true, but also of someone who enjoyed toying with other people. It just made that woman all the more terrifying.

Jodie-sensei wouldn't need to tell Gin and Vodka all she knew. All she needed to tell them to set them on the right track were that Ran had been claiming that the Kudo Shinichi they had supposedly killed was alive and well, contacting her by phone once a week or so. But—why hadn't Jodie-sensei told Gin and Vodka before? Was she possibly just biding her time for some reason known only to her? Or had she been waiting for something? Ran's heart sank, her face becoming clouded with pain. It seemed like this time, as were most times, Shinichi's words did ring true once again. All he needed now to prove that Jodie-sensei was associated with the Kurozukume was evidence.

The elevator door opened, and she spotted Ai perched upon the chair, reading the book she had set there before she followed Jodie-sensei to the 38th floor. "Ai."

She didn't look up from the book as she said, "Kudo's coming."

Ran nodded and sat down next to Ai, reading over her shoulder (which, considering the latter's height, wasn't that hard to do) to avoid thinking about other things.

They had read five pages or so when Ai put down the book and turned to Ran. It didn't seem like she was very interested in the story, either. Not while they were living a much more exciting one. "Ran…" She had never seen Ai so uncomfortable before.

"Hm?" Her eyes, momentarily discarding their own sorrow, turned to the other girl.

"You like him." Ai lifted her gaze to meet Ran's.

Ran knew she didn't need to give any indication of affirmation. It was a statement, not a question.

The blonde averted her eyes. "And he loves you, more than anything else. Anything. I see it in his eyes, and I see it in yours. Just because I'm a genius doesn't mean I don't feel."

Ran gazed at the other girl, not sure what she was trying to say. "I know you feel, Ai. We all know. Everyone feels."

"Because everyone has a heart, no matter how focused they are on living by their mind."

Silence. Ran opened her mouth to ask her meaning, and stopped as her face clouded with worry and realization dawned her—for someone so dense at realizing Shinichi's feelings for her, and so slow at realizing hers for Shinichi, she was quick to see almost everything else that touched human hearts—and she placed a hand on Ai's shoulder. "Ai, you mean you love him?"

Ai sighed sadly, nodded, and then shook her head furiously. "No…that is, I _like_ him. Although I'm not sure if I love him or not. I'm not sure if I love him like you love him, like he loves you."

"Oh, Ai…" she trailed off, at a loss for words.

"I know I'm only a friend to him, and I know how much he loves you. So much that usually there's only room for two things in his mind. You, and whatever case he's trying to solve. So I tell myself 'no'. But you can't imagine how hard it is to control your heart when you like someone."

"Yes, I can," she murmured softly.

Ai stopped and looked at her, breaking into a forlorn grin. "Sorry. I forgot who I was talking to."

Ran's grin matched hers. "Don't worry about it. Go on."

Ai hesitated. "Does it seem weird? That I'm confessing to you of all people?"

Ran frowned. The thought had never really occurred to her. "I suppose it would…"

"I never would've dared it before. I don't know why I'm doing it now…I guess it's because I know you better now, and I know you can understand."

Ran studied her averted features before speaking. "Is this another reason—"

"—that I didn't want to turn back into Miyano Shiiho?" She turned to face the other girl for a second before averting her eyes again, saying more quietly, "Yeah. To not give myself the opportunity to think I have a chance. Because I don't. I never did. Your relationship is so strong, so fragile, no one can break it."

"'So I don't tempt myself…'" Ran echoed.

Ai nodded, her small smile shedding some of its sadness. "And I want to start my life over, to forget him. But I won't forget him for a long time."

"Least of all with the Kurozukume up and about, and him dogging them."

"And you know what happens whenever Shinichi's set like that," she said softly, her smile full of the reason why people did smile.

Ai nodded, and her grin abandoned all of its sadness for a glint of mischief in her eyes as well as upon her lips. "Like when he's set on you."

She jumped, surprised at the other girl's sudden turn of feeling. Then the words sunk in. "What's that supposed to mean! You're making me sound like a criminal!" Ran tried not to grin, but the blush that crept onto her cheeks gave away her amusement.

Ai just grinned and glanced over Ran's shoulder. "Oh, there he is right now. How convenient."

"Ai! If you weren't a year older than me I'd—well, use your imagination."

"And since I am…" she shrugged, the grin still pasted on her face.

Ran blinked, trying desperately to formulate a response and failing miserably thanks to the heat on her cheeks.

They walked to the main lobby, the grins almost washed off their faces as they prepared themselves for the potential d-day at hand.


	8. Culmination

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

Culmination

"You call that a disguise!" exclaimed Ran, casting a critical eye over the sunglasses and jacket.

"Well, you're not forcing me to wear those glasses again," Shinichi shot back.

Ran shrugged and fixed the collar of his jacket.

"Ran!"

"Shut up and listen. I've got a feeling that we might have trouble finding where Rum is."

Shinichi waited for her to explain. She didn't. "That's no surprise. But what makes you say that?"

"I was watching the numbers above the elevator. The light that was on the panel that marked the basement vanished for two minutes, and then appeared again on the basement panel before going to the lobby. How d'you explain that, Shinichi?"

His hand went to his chin, and he began slowly, "From what we've got so far, the two likely places that Rum can be at are room 3816, and wherever the elevator went off to. Jodie-sensei, or whoever she really was—"

"Vermouth," mumbled Ai.

"What?"

Ai looked up at Shinichi and sighed. Reluctantly, she said the dreaded name again. "Vermouth."

He nodded. "Vermouth went to the room first, then to the elevator. And from the way the elevator was constructed, it seems that wherever it went to is where Rum is. But where did it go to?"

The three were quiet, each lost in his or her own thoughts, in their own fight against the tides of despair.

"Wait," Ran said, interrupting the silence once again. "I recorded this Vermouth, and the elevator panel, when I was following her. It's not likely that the camera recorded anything that could help us, but since we've got no other lead, why not give it a shot?"

Shinichi hesitated, and then nodded dubiously. "I guess we could try…"

Ai cut in, "No need, and there might not be enough time to get at them. By the time we can get to Dr. Agasa's place to play the recording, Vermouth might've already left, and there might be a chance the Rum doesn't spend all his time at the Beika Hotel. Although Vermouth is pretty high up there as far as ranking goes…" She shook her head and continued, "I've heard enough about Rum to know that he's too tricky to settle for a plain room, where anyone can stumble upon his plans. The basement is a far more safer bet."

"True…although if he's that clever, wouldn't he think that, if someone was trying to catch him, they would head for the more obscure place, the basement, and therefore put himself in room 3816?" wondered Ran.

"Although why would he be worrying about someone trying to catch him? Gin and Vodka's words were precaution enough," Shinichi said. "Even if they aren't, we still don't know where the elevator dropped Vermouth off. Since it's hard to find—certainly harder to find than room 3816, wouldn't he be safer there?"

Ran nodded, shaking her head and grinning.

Shinichi jerked his head to the elevator. "I'm going to go investigate, just in case."

"What'd you find?"

He shook his head. "Nothing."

Ran bit her lip. "So what're we to do now?" Her hand went to her earring again. Shinichi glanced at her, and then at her hand, grinning as his mind took on an idea. "Ran, did you leave the camera on when you were waiting for Vermouth to come out of the room?"

She nodded. "Why?"

"Then we might have a lead."

"But I thought you said it wasn't likely that I got anything—"

"I forgot that Dr. Agasa and Ai made it so that it recorded things normal human ears couldn't hear."

Ran shot him a questioning look while Ai said, "But it might take too long. By then, Vermouth might've already left—"

"It's a risk we're going to have to take, Haibera. Playing the recording here is sure to arouse someone's suspicion, since it seems that the owner of the hotel is associated with the Kurozukume, or else there's a very little chance they would locate Rum here."

Ai still looked reluctant.

"Right now, there's no other way," said Ran.

The eighteen-year-old finally sighed and said, "Okay, fine. Since that seems to be the only rational way to go…"

"Okay, I think this is it, Dr. Agasa," Shinichi said.

Ran's clip-ons lay on the table, and one of the artificial pearls appeared broken in half. Near them, a short man dressed in the characteristic white lab coat sat atop a computer chair and typed away. The top of his head was completely bald, and what hair he had on his sides was the shade of dirty snow even though he was only in his mid-fifties. A pleasant face, mostly dominated by a round nose, was inches from the computer screen, which showed a murky window set in a door that was still visible despite the darkness of the setting. "Okay, adjust the volume a bit, and we should have it," he instructed himself.

Shinichi, Ran, Ai, and Dr. Agasa jumped simultaneously at the chaos of noise that assaulted their ears, and through it all, one could barely make out a voice almost equally as emotionless as Gin's that said, "I don't think I've seen you before. Who're you, and what's your business with the boss?"

A pause.

"Relax, moron, it's me. This wig has been giving me a headache since lunch."

"Ah, Vermouth. Great disguise, as usual. It's been awhile. How've you been?"

The feminine voice Ran had associated before with her English teacher had been transformed into the one Ai feared, cold as winter wind and every bit as effective. "I've been better. This is urgent, Bourbon. I need to speak to Rum. I went over to Gin's place, and waited there for hours, and he never came back. I think it might have something to do with what I told him and Vodka earlier on. Boss said he'd be here."

The other voice, the one no one recognized, replied, "Very well then. Take the elevator to your right, and make sure nobody gets on with you. If they do, wait for them to get off before pressing the basement button twice. The elevator's programmed to bring you to a second basement. Pretty clever Mr. Akihiro's part, don't you think?"

"It's well enough. Where's the bathroom? There was a staff meeting at that school, or else I would've gotten here earlier."

"The bathroom's down the hall, to the right. I thought you said it was urgent."

"True, but I still have to look like myself, don't I? And Vermouth can't tolerate such a disgusting shade of green."

The faint sound of heels on carpet, then the sound of the bathroom door closing.

"Good. That's all we need to know," said Shinichi. He added silently, "We're this close to capturing the leader of the Kurozukume once and for all."

"Thanks, Professor Agasa," Ran lifted herself from the computer desk she had been bending over. "Now all that's left to do is phone the police."

Ai nodded. "But don't you think we should go over there, just in case something goes wrong?"

Shinichi nodded. "Good idea." He walked over to the phone and dialed the number. "Hey,

Inspector Megure. We know where he is."

They let themselves out of the police car and hurried through the glass doors, followed closely by Inspector Megure and a hoard of police officers. "Inspector," Shinichi said, "you'd better leave a couple people outside, just in case. The owner of the hotel is working with the Kurozukume, too."

Inspector Megure nodded. "So where's Rum?"

"Take the elevator on the right, and push the basement button twice. And there's activity around room 3816, too."

The orange-uniformed policeman nodded and directed a dozen or so people to the 38th floor. The rest followed him down the right elevator. Shinichi, Ran, and Ai remained in the lobby, watching as the owner of the Beika was handcuffed, somewhat uneventfully, by the handful of police the inspector had left there. Five minutes afterward, and three police officers came back from the secret basement, accompanying a handcuffed man in a black business suit, cursing and struggling to no avail. From his voice, Shinichi guessed him to be the one in room 3816—Bourbon. Following them a few minutes afterwards was Vermouth. She glanced at Ran, then at Shinichi, and finally rested her eyes on Ai, who had left her pigtails back at Dr. Agasa's. Her eyes narrowed, and disgust edged upon her lips, slowly spreading to the rest of her features, and she didn't look quite as beautiful as before. "Sherry."

Before Ai could answer, and before anyone could stop her, she whipped around at the two police officers holding her captive. Dished to each a good heel in the face. Despite her handcuffs, she reached into her pocket and, like greased lightning, whipped out a gun and took aim. The lobby trembled at the sound of the shot, and before anyone—even Ai herself—could do anything, Vermouth's victim crashed to the floor, a wave of red fire bursting into flame upon her chest.

"Ai!" Ran grabbed hold of the back of a sofa for support, her face a ghostly white, while Shinichi ran to the fallen girl. Their one-syllabled word was drowned out in a burst of laughter as Vermouth, like her victim, sank to the floor as if she had been shot herself, the gun tumbling from her hand to the thick red carpet. Tears streamed miniature rivers on the flawless scenery of her face, and for a whole minute or so, the whole world seemed drowned within the silence she had ejected, with the exception, of course, of she herself. Hatred, bitterness, despair, and a strange sense of joy all made themselves known within her form, and perhaps it was they, combined and blended in within each other like a swirl of light and star, that had lent her the amazing speed with which she had acted to spear Haibara Ai, Miyano Shiiho, Sherry's life into pieces no one could ever regain again.

"Idiots! Why didn't you check to see if she had a gun with her!" Inspector Megure yelled at the police officers who, slowly and painfully, were picking themselves up from the floor. He had just arrived with the third and last member of the Kurozukume, Rum, in tow, and had witnessed the whole thing.

"We did," one of them answered while the other secured the still-convulsive Vermouth.

"So why did she have one!"

"I don't know. She could've picked it up afterwards."

Ran had already knelt down at Ai's side, oblivious to both Vermouth's outburst and what had happened subsequencing it. She squeezed Ai's hand, a smile of relief washing over her face and spirit as she felt a weak response back. "Shinichi's going to call the hospital. Just hang on, Ai, you might still have a chance." She nodded to Shinichi, who had knelt down beside them, his brow furrowed in worry. "Hang in there, Haibera."

With the exception of Vermouth's attack on Ai, the police had successfully contained with all of the Kurozukume they could find. And that wasn't saying much. However, they _did_ uncover within Rye's desk the files of everyone within and associated within the Kurozukume organization. And in the weeks that followed, every one of them had been caught as easily as the day would catch the sun. However, just as it was for every bad thing, there was always a bright side, so it was vice versa, and the dark side to the almost miraculous event seemed, at first, beyond God's common reason.

Haibera Ai had died as soon as the ambulance reached the hospital. Her heart beat its last breath as soon as the wheels stopped turning. And she had a heart. Because everyone has a heart, no matter how focused they are on living by their mind.

It didn't help that Shinichi and Ran were obligated to stay and make sure every one of the Kurozukume present had been dealt with, and by the time they were finished, the ambulance had already come and gone. So all they could do was linger in the waiting room, armed with a sense of impending dread.

A nurse walked into the room, carrying the hat Ai had worn to the Beikan on more than one occasion. She walked to the two sitting on the couch, the unwanted but needed message she was about to deliver overshadowing a voice that was trained to console. "This was hers. I think you might want to have it."

Ran raised her eyes to the nurse's, unconsciously reaching for Shinichi's hand but stopping herself. "She's—"

"She died as soon as they got her to the hospital." No matter how many times she had been trained to say it, numbers alone couldn't take away the concern within the nurse's face. Ran silently thanked her for that.

She lowered her head again, to the hat the nurse had set on the table before them. "Ai."

Both of them were dry-eyed as of then, dry eyes full of the regret and panic and worry that tears had yet to wash away. Shinichi squeezed her hand, trying to comfort her while having to deal with his own agony at losing a colleague, and more importantly, a friend, to the indescribable, unknown force he had often deployed his work around. "C'mon. We've got to tell Professor Agasa." He got up, looking at Ran, who was oblivious to his words as she wrapped herself in her own memories, sparse as they were, of the one who had left their presence, undoubtedly for God's. After all, Ai had died with a good heart. Slowly, Ran got up too, blinking rapidly. "Yeah," was all she could say.

Shinichi picked up the baseball cap and, with Ran, walked out of the room that he never wanted to see again.

"Good, you're back!" Professor Agasa's smile faded rapidly as he noticed the stolid expressions on both of their faces and Ai's presence replaced with that of her hat. "What happened?"

"She's—" Ran began before her voice gave way.

"Vermouth shot her," her best friend said between clenched teeth. "It was already too late when she arrived at the hospital."

Whatever Professor Agasa was expecting to dread, it wasn't the words that confronted his ears. The cup of coffee he had been holding crashed to the ground, and he made no attempt to soak up the brown liquid that was already staining the carpet. Instead, he pasted his eyes on the hat, his fingers trembling with the shock his voice expressed with its absence. A dreadful silence reigned within the room, until one of them felt a tingling beneath her eyes. "Um, I think I'd better go."

Shinichi nodded, understanding immediately, looking after her as she left.

She ran home crying. Ai had been haunted by her own past so much that it was her past that ended her. If only she had changed back into Shiiho when she had the chance…! An adult body was much more inept at surviving bullets to the lungs than a child's. But that realization alone wasn't what caused the relentless, twisting knife within her. It was hard to turn one's life around, to turn one's back on the thing that one had relied on for the eighteen years of one's life. And yet, Ai had coped. Coped, and in a way, thrived in the change. All her life, all she had known was the Kurozukume. Her parents had died before they could give her many memories, and the syndicate killed the only family she had left. They were going to kill her if she hadn't thought of depriving them of the satisfaction. What little taste she had of life outside of the organization that had put invisible bars around her, she had appreciated. She deserved more. She deserved more. She had liked Shinichi, yet she had managed to accept his feelings toward her as only that of a friend's. Even if she did think too scientifically, and sometimes forgot to feel when she was bitten by hate. She deserved more. Some people always seem to deserve more than what they got.

She was gasping for air when she reached the door to the detective agency. Whether it was from the running, or the crying, or the mixed feelings, or all three, she didn't know. She leaned on the hand that clutched the doorknob and waited for her breathing to settle. Then she entered as her father slammed the newspaper he had been reading onto his desk.

"About time! Where the hell were you? It's eleven, and I haven't—Ran?" His expression turned from impatient to one of concern as soon as he saw her cover her eyes with a hand. "What happened?"

She didn't answer, and her silence made Kogoro, being Kogoro, jump to conclusions. "What'd

that Kudo kid—"

She cut him off sharply, not anticipating what he was going to say but not really caring. "No, it wasn't him, Dad. I'll explain, but not right now."

He nodded. "I'll go outside to eat. You can skip dinner if you want."

She nodded back, still too traumatized to be thankful. It wasn't often her father even made an effort to be considerate. Somehow she found the door to her room despite the blurry veil her tears cast over her eyes. She collapsed onto the bed, weeping in a sense of loss that she was no stranger to. Except this time, there was no hope. Only despair, and the remembrance she knew and loved so well. She cherished her memories of the people she cared about, and she knew that Ai would've, if only she had the chance. Even if they had died, as long as someone could pick out the goodness that inhabited everyone and everything, then their death wouldn't be half so painful, their legacy a thousand times more endearing.

She didn't know if Ai even had a life from before. Before the Kurozukume. But she had experienced it in those long, long months, and for one who had nothing but the things that came along with her being, it wasn't fair that her freedom from wrongdoing was reduced down into those months, long as they were for Ran. She deserved more.


	9. Remembering

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan.

•Remembering•

She awoke to a sunshine she didn't feel, and with tremendous effort, got herself up. No matter how many people died, no matter how important or small they were, life went on, like the steady drip-dropping of water upon rock, and the water slowly diminishing the rock over the accumulation of ages.

It was an unexpected relief to find that it was Saturday. With a sigh, she walked over to the window, gazing down at the street below. It all belonged to her life, as much her as her room, her bed, her house, her clothes, her school. They meant nothing to her. Not the relieving sort of nothing, the nothing-nothing of oblivion, the nothing within the silence, but the sort of nothing that leaves you lost. They all meant nothing to her, the nothing of the lost. The nothing-nothing of oblivion made her feel as if she had more than that, a life that overrode the pettiness humanity wrapped around itself. And she did. She had an identity. One identity, not two, like one person she knew used to have. Like one person she used to know still had. No, she still knew that person. Just because that person was gone didn't mean she was lost to the ones who remember her, the ones who aren't afraid to speak her name. Her names.

The ringing telephone dragged her out of her thoughts. After the second ring it stopped, and she could make out beyond the closed door, her father's voice as he said, "Mouri Kogoro Detective Agency. Oh, it's _you_. Lemme see if she—"

Ran had opened the door of her room and slowly crossed the room to the desk, looking expectantly at her father. Without another word, he handed the phone to her. She placed it to her ear, both hands clutching it, as if she was afraid Shinichi might still slip away from her life like he had done once before. Once was enough. She didn't think she could ever stop feeling that way. She wiped away the tears from last night, and the ones that had begun to flow just a few minutes ago. Hoping her voice didn't crack, she cautiously said, "Shinichi?"

"Hey."

"Hey yourself," she whispered tiredly.

"Are you…are you okay?" She could tell the voice on the other end was concerned for her welfare, but also trying to hide its owner's own, similar emotions.

"I thought you said you could tell how I was just by listening to my voice on the phone," she thought, but didn't say out loud. She knew his words were there just to show her that he cared. But even without them, she would know he cared. He always cared, for life and for truth. And for her.That made him Shinichi. Instead, she ventured, "Are you?"

"No."

She knew what he meant, but didn't say so.

"But it's going to be better."

She nodded. "I know."

"I was looking at her hat."

She replied in silence, waiting for him to go on.

"The camera was turned on, and it wasn't when Vermouth shot her. You think…?" He trailed off, knowing he didn't need to explain any further, and knowing also that the silence on the other end of the receiver meant that his best friend was trying to fight a fresh knew army of tears.She should never fight her emotions, not because she usually lost, but because her emotions were what made her. Emotions, along with several thousand more miracles.

"Well, there's only one way to find out," she finally said. "I'll come by."

"I'll be waiting."

"Bye."

She hung up, opened the door, and said to Kogoro, "I'm going to Shinichi's."

Before he could reply, she was down the steps, walking rapidly and trying to escape feelings she knew she could never leave behind.

He opened the door before she could even knock or ring his doorbell. She glanced at him, at the Shinichi she had missed beyond reason, beyond eternity, for so, so long. He didn't look like he had cried, but then again, he was always better at hiding his emotions than she was. He was just as downcast, just as overwhelmed by memories of what Ai had done for him as she was—maybe even more. None of it was evident on his face, but she could tell. She didn't know how, but she could tell. He had had his own private thoughts, his own regrets, his own despair like she had had. And she suspected they weren't much different from hers.

"Where's the hat?"

Without a word, he led her to the kitchen table and picked it up, holding it as carefully as if it was Ai's soul he held between his hands. His voice shook. "It's still pretty hard to believe, Ran. That she's ...gone, I mean."

She nodded, looking at the hat. Her tone was soft. "We get so used to seeing people walk into our lives without any announcement, it's sort of a shock to see them walk out of them in the same way."

"I was never this stricken when I was at a murder case. But now I know what it's like to have a relation to the victim. And there isn't a mystery to who killed her. I'm just glad that that person's behind bars."

"Jodie-sensei…" She realized now that although the majority of her tears were for Ai, a part of them was for the teacher she had lost, and had trusted. Trusted wrongly. But she wasn't wrong for trusting. It was whom she had trusted. She knew that, all too well. After all, trust had rekindled her life as well as driven a wooden stake through it. She wasn't a vampyress. Wooden stakes were useless to someone whom others had sometimes deemed an angel. (She wondered for the first time if she would ever really live up to that name.) And what good was wood when it met flame? A brief bridge into beyond, and that was about all. She raised her eyes from Ai's baseball cap to find Shinichi watching her curiously. "Um, we should probably have Dr. Agasa here, too."

"Yeah. Whatever this may be, I've a feeling he'll want to see it, too."

It took six persistent rings to get the professor to the phone. "Hello?"

"Dr. Agasa, it's Shinichi. The camera you installed into Haibera's hat was on when I was looking at it, and I was pretty sure it was off when—er, at the hotel. I thought maybe we should check it out."

There was a brief period of indecision, then the professor said, "All right. I'll see what I can do.

In a few minutes after Dr. Agasa arrived, the camera had been taken off from its home under the beak of the hat and a small black chip had been carefully inserted with tweezers into the computer in Shinichi's room. Gradually Ai's face, framed by her blonde hair, appeared on the screen.

"I'm hoping you'd get this, Kudo," she said, and it was obvious what effort it took her just to speak from the way her mouth formed over her words and the strain of her voice. "From the way you notice these things, this one should be a cinch. Show this to Ran and Dr. Agasa, okay? I just want to get a few words in with you before it's too late. Because I know I'm going to die. The pain's left me with the blood.

"Listen, don't regret what happened, okay? I don't. Of course, it could have to do with me being about to die, but…" she trailed off and chuckled slightly at her feeble joke. "Vermouth and Gin and everyone in that organization, they've hated me so much, I could kind of guess that it would be one of them who would kill me. Ever since I took that pill, I knew my days were numbered. Even after I realized the pill wasn't going to kill me. Luckily, it didn't." She smiled here, and despite the ghostly whiteness of her face, now she resembled the Ai her current audience had lamented over. "Because I would've never met you, nor Ayumi and Genta and Mitsuhiko, who're nice kids, even if they are, well, kids. Nor Dr. Agasa, nor Ran, nor anyone else. And really, you've done so much more for me than I for you. You gave me friends, and to someone whose whole life is—was like mine, it's really not that hard to realize how priceless friends can be. So thank you, Shinichi.

"Don't regret my decision to remain a kid, either. I know that if I had been in my former form—I can never really think of it as my true form now—I might have survived the bullet. But remember, this is my decision. And once someone makes a decision, they're accepting the consequences, whether they know what they are or not. These are the consequences, and somehow, I don't think this is a bad turnout after all. Can you tell Dr. Agasa thanks, for doing so many things for me and all? Somehow he made it up. Made up for all the family I lost, by just being there.

"And lastly, I don't want to die knowing that you don't know how I feel about you. It's almost funny, how someone who can solve mysteries like you can can't even tell the slightest thing about someone else's feelings. Especially if those feelings happen to be liking you. A lot. I talked with Ran about it, and I'm still not sure if it's love. You never knew, did you? I've been thinking about it, and I've accepted a long time ago how you only hold me in your mind as a friend, but that doesn't make me stop liking you. I had been hoping someday that, when all of this is over, something might happen to make me stop liking you like this, and only as a friend. Maybe this is the something that I had been hoping for. Actually, I'm sure it is. I know how important Ran is to you, and I know how important you are to Ran. I see it. So I guess it's okay with me, to see you two together. Actually, I think I may not prefer it any other way. That's another reason I remained…this way. I've told Ran, when we were waiting for you at the Beikan. How I didn't want to even give myself an opportunity to think I had a chance of replacing Ran. Because that's never, ever going to happen. You two—sometimes it seems you've loved each other all your lives, and like I've told Ran, that sort of love is too strong and too fragile for anyone to break. So promise me two things, Shinichi: Tell Ayumi and Genta and Mitsuhiko what happened. I know you were planning to tell them when they grew up a little bit, but they deserve to know right now. While it's easy to make them believe the truth. And the other thing is to not let this news, plus the fact that I'm…dead, get in the way of what you two have." She grinned here with the happiness that she had missed when she was still Sherry, still Miyano Shiiho.

"Oh yeah, and tell Ran that what she said, about as long as I loved my family, I wouldn't be afraid

of remembering, as long as I give things time—well, I have. It took her words to help me. And I do cherish my memories, even if I have to give them up when I'm gone—I'm counting on you and Ran and Dr. Agasa and the kids to remember them for me."

The girl on the computer screen smiled again, this time with an exasperated expression, and sighed. "Look at me, Ai, analytical enough to be annoying, writing my own will. You did this to me, you know. Ran, Shinichi…you did this to me. Thanks." She sighed again. "I guess…I guess this is good-bye." It had been a small miracle that she had said all of those things while the life was leaking out of her body, drop by ruby red drop, but her face also seemed peaceful, at a genuine relief for the first time. There was no question whether she would've been the same if the APTX 4869 had killed her. The world wouldn't have been the same if that APTX 4869 had done what Gin thought it was supposed to do. And maybe a part of her was relieved, and not only at the thought of leaving the world without having to worry about how the people she was only too lucky to leave behind would wreak havoc on more still others, those who had had better lives than she. No, there was a small relief at locking her memories of what she hated—and those that she loved—into a chest of unbeing and swallowing the key of death, and of not having to fear what the future might hold for her. Because the future, as she knew it, had just closed its doors to her. And that was not an entirely bad thing. Not when another door opened to her: the door of nothing-nothing oblivion, of nothing within the silence. How that silence, that oblivion, that nothing was represented, out of the four people in the room, only Haibera Ai, Miyano Shiiho, no longer bound by the string of life to the name of Sherry of the Kurozukume, knew. Whether it was announced by the trumpets of angels, or by the silence of darkness, or by something else altogether, they all summed up to one thing.

"Ai," said Dr. Agasa, smiling sadly as she slowly drifted away from them for the second and final time. He turned the computer screen off and stood there, gazing into the darkness of the glass that stared stolidly back at him. Finally he said hoarsely as he turned around to face Shinichi and Ran, "I think I'll show myself the door. I need to…" he trailed off, and Shinichi smiled at him gratefully.

Ran sat down on the bed, staining her cheeks with tears rid of regret and guilt, and full only of sweet, sweet, remembrance of the brief friendship she had had, and infused within that remembrance the remembrance of Shinichi's friendship with Ai.

After a second glance at Ran, and then at Shinichi, Dr. Agasa closed the door after him, his footfalls on the stairs receding slowly and painfully with each thought of his former colleague and adoptive "daughter".

"Who would've thought it would end like this?" wondered Ran out loud, not troubling to wipe away her tears now that there was only Shinichi to see them. And really, sometimes she felt it was only Shinichi who should see them, because sometimes he seemed to be the only one who understood them.

"Don't hold back, Ran," Shinichi whispered. He sat down beside her, watching her. "Ai did. Think it would end like this, I mean. But really," he smiled and gently ran a hand through her hair, "it hasn't ended. Not yet. And I don't think it ever will, not by a long shot. Life goes on."

She returned his smile. "It's worth it." She encircled her arms around his neck and whispered, "I promise I'll remember. For Ai, and for you."

The way he held her close to him, as if he could never let her go, come Heaven or heathen or anything else that would try to stand in their way, was so natural—as if she belonged there—she couldn't help but feel all of their troubles, their woes and their memories melting into one another, and into one another's soul. Memories remembered from before. Before Ai's death, before the Kurozukume. An essence, a feeling, an emotion older than time had interwoven their destinies into a single red string—that is, if the ifs and whens all aligned, if they had chosen to be the them that they had become. And they had chosen to be. "Then everything's going to be okay."

She was the first to break away, gently. Her right hand slipped down his back to close over his on her waist, and she brought it up to her cheek. Closed her eyes. "Why?" She opened her eyes to meet his, and the Heaven she saw within their blue, blue depths. She dropped her hand, but his still stayed on her cheek.

He raised an eyebrow in question, and smiled when he realized her meaning. Hr leaned a bit closer, smiling softly. "For many reasons."

"Oh? How many?"

"Countless ones that I can name, and countless ones I can't." His grip on her tightened, bringing her closer. _You're innocent, and somehow, you manage to preserve that despite…despite so many things that have happened. I can feel it. You can see so many things, things that not even I can see. You can see how people feel, see how they think, and you're made wise by your innocence. Seventeen years, and I finally realize it when we were…well, apart. I know that if I say this, you're probably going to laugh, but when you look like this, I know I'd protect you, stand by you, and all the angels in Heaven, and all the spawn of hell, and anything and anyone in between—no matter how much they try, they can't ever stop my loving you. Even _you_ can't, and out of all the angels in Heaven, and out of all the angels on earth, you're my favorite._

"You've come through so much. I've said it once, Ran, and I'll say it again. I saw your tears. I saw what caused them, and I couldn't forgive myself knowing that what had caused them was me."

"You're going to have to forgive yourself. Because I would never forgive you if you didn't," she said. The look he gave her was enough to last her an eternity. Just like he had, his smile changed her life. "Ran." The arm that held her pressed her ever closer against him. "Sometimes I feel like you've got a soul older than time. As old as love. And love made time."

She grinned at the last sentence. "You think so too? About love making time, I mean."

He nodded. "Yeah." _And you've got a strength inside you. Even before I saw you, in that alley with Gin and Vodka, I knew. You were yourself. And that's why I love you. You've got something that few in this world have ever seen, and I'm just thankful I get to see it within you. You've got a strength inside, and you can use it as long as you have a reason. You know what that strength comes from, Ran? It comes from your innocence, and your wisdom, and your vulnerability. And it comes from your goodness, your purity. All these passing years have proved that._ "But really, Ran, you want to know why I really love you? I love you because I do."

"That was all I wanted to hear," she said. "That was all."

"But you know what I said came straight from here." He guided her hand to his heart. "And what was all?"

"The last part. I love you because I do."

There was the spark of mischief she loved in his smile. "You do?"

She laughed, caught in his trap. "I do."

It was then that she realized how close her body was to his, how close their faces were, how close their hearts and souls were. But it was too late to break free—and, she realized later, even if it wasn't too late, maybe she wouldn't have released herself from his arms anyway. His lips met hers, a kiss that sealed destinies into one another by a single red string. It was worth it.

••


End file.
